Last night, I was watching “Troll“, a movie from 1986:
And, to my surprise, I realized that two of the main characters are named “Harry Potter”.
Harry Potter Jr. (above) aka Atreyu from “The Neverending Story“, is played by Noah Hathaway.
Troll is much older J. K. Rowling’s somewhat more-famous creation. Is there a relation? Is the entire Harry Potter series actually an homage to her favorite film? Can it be mere coincidence, or is the insidious Black Magik of the Troll somehow at play? If you have any input, feel free to post a comment. I am eager to find out more… and kind of afraid.
Plot:
There are so few opportunities to watch Julie Louis-Dreyfus run around wearing ivy (And only ivy.) that you have to take notice of this film. When the Potters move into a new apartment they never dream what will happen next, their daughter Wendy is soon replaced by a malevolent troll! The capricious creature enjoys confusing Harry or Anne with strange antics, almost to the point of neglecting it’s true goal. Slowly and surely it uses a magical ring to turn the other apartments into magical forests, each one populated by the transformed inhabitants. Harry Jr. takes pains to avoid his sister, mainly since she is beating him up, (Really not good for the budding male psyche - getting thrown around by your little sister.) so he befriends Eunice. She gives him a magical spear to defeat the Troll’s minions, good thing since she fares poorly against them. In a bizarre twist ending the Troll foils his own plans, plunging the magical spear into the guardian beast to save Wendy’s life. There is even one more twist ending involving a police officer and the laundry room, but we won’t go into that
Image/Plot Source: Star Pulse / Bad Movies
You know what else is weird? The actor’s name is Noah Hathaway. In the film, his mother is named “Anne”…
That’s right. ANNE HATHAWAY IS THE TROLL. Let’s get a lynch mob together!
The story of Harry Potter was invented by Leonard da Vinci at a dinner party in 1489. He wrote down a rough outline of the main characters and the setting using his personal typewriter which he had invented earlier that day (and smashed in anger during the hangover he suffered the following morning). Soured on the whole affair, Leonardo stashed away the outline in a cupboard in his attic and promptly forgot about it. 30 years later the outline was found by a destitute and depressed gardener searching Leonardo’s house for some bewildering invention or appliance with which to kill himself. The gardener, realizing the fantastic potential of the outline, decided to turn his life around. Using the magical powers of the manuscript the gardener became a powerful, respected, intelligent and extremely happy man.
While lying on his deathbed, with the contentment and exceptional understanding of the Universe that can only accompany a truly enlightened soul, he told his eldest son about the outline and its magical powers. He explained to his son that if he would harness the power of the outline, he could have everything he ever desired. But he also warned his son about ever actually making the outline into a successful series of novels, for doing so would surely spell disaster. Once released from the constraints of the paper it was written on, the magical potential of the outline would grow in size and power, until it would finally destroy the current owner of the outline, if not the entire universe. The ex-gardener told his son to pass down the outline to his own son with the same instructions, thus ensuring that the outline would never fall into the wrong hands.
Exactly what happened next is unclear; it seems likely that the father-son chain was broken at some point, and the outline was lost. This might have been the end of the story if it weren’t for the fact that from time to time, the unmistakable effects of the outline would make themselves obvious in wildly different parts of the world. The outline would fall into the hands of seemingly arbitrary people, though usually ones with little social prestige or prospects for the future, and the lucky chumps would suddenly rise through the ranks of society, not to mention the ranks of intelligence. Effects of the outline are recorded in the former Huguang province of China, in Caazapá, Paraguay and in the Eyalet of Varat in the Ottoman Empire, to name just a few incidents. Fortunately, no one ever tried to adapt the outline into a successful series of novels.
At some point in the 1970’s the outline came into the hands of a homeless man in Belleville, Illinois. The man recognized the power of the outline, but, in a remarkably selfless move, he decided to simply give it to a young boy that he had taken a liking to — a boy named John Carl Buechler. For some unknown reason, the outline did not have its usual effect on Buechler. Granted, he did make it into the movie business, but his movies are by most accounts not very good, and no one has reported seeing in him a marked rise in enlightenment or happiness. Some theorize that instabilities in the magical fabric of the Universe have confused the powers of the outline and made it function in unpredictable ways. It may also be for this reason that Buechler was not attuned to the magical properties of the outline, which would explain why he did not have the innate misgivings about transferring the outline’s contents over to other media that everyone else who had gained control of the outline previously appears to have had. And so it came to pass that Buechler drew some inspiration from the outline for his film ‘Troll’. Fortunately, Buechler only thought to use the name “Harry Potter” for the film, and only because he rather liked the sound of it. Despite the fact that two of the main characters were named Harry Potter, the Universe remained relatively safe.
But as it turns out, this was only the beginning, for we are about to enter the final phase of the story of the magical outline. It is assumed that Buechler lost the outline during a trip to Great Britain, possibly on the train from Manchester to London. Wherever it happened, the outline was found by one Joanne Rowling. Unfortunately, the magical instabilities had changed the effects of the outline again, and this time they appear to have conspired against us all in the worst way possible. The aspects of the magic that cause the owner of the outline great fortune seem to have been concentrated specifically towards the purpose of commercial success, and their strength has been greatly increased. It’s also clear that Rowling has experienced no misgivings about using the outline for the express purpose of adaptation, as can be plainly seen. And so it has at last come to pass that Leonardo’s outline has been made into a successful series of novels, and the awesome power of the magic of the outline has been unleashed. The movie adaptations and assorted merchandise probably haven’t helped matters.
Some claim that Rowling is the mastermind behind the whole affair. It has been suggested that she is herself a witch, and that the instability in the fabric of magic is the result of her (eventually successful) attempts to focus and strengthen the power of the outline. There are even those who claim that Rowling is none other than Leonardo himself, having traveled to our time with a time machine he allegedly once invented on a bet. Whatever the case, the future of our universe is uncertain. But the damage cannot be undone. The power of Harry Potter is out in the wild, and it can never be reined back in. Let us pray that it all blows over somehow. Personally, I’m not optimistic.