Criticker.com - Film Recommendations and Community
currently at ...
the Forum The Dark Knight Rises
the Blog DVD Report - May 15th
login | register
0 films ranked
You Explore Interact Resources
Search
Profile All Your Rankings Starred Reviews Your Best TCIs PSIs Kumpels Wishlist
Random Film

Archive for August, 2008 Page 2 of 3



Quiz: Which Lebowski Are You?

It’s unforgivable, but the guys who run Criticker had, until this past weekend, never seen The Big Lebowski. Worthy of a post in the forum topic, “Movies You’re Most Embarrassed about Not Having Seen“.

Anyway, we’ve seen it now and of course immediately fell in love with The Dude, Maude, the Nihilists and all the other hilarious characters in this film. It’s been mentioned many times in Criticker users’ mini reviews that The Big Lebowski is possibly the most quotable film of all time.

This morning, while searching for a ring tone that says “Dime Sandra. Sí? Sí? Qué ridículo! Bwahaha!!”, I came across a quiz that reveals which Big Lebowski character you would be. It’s a fun little time waster, and I was ecstatic to learn that I am Jesus Quintana, the pederast.


Me.

So which are you? Post results in the comments.

And if anyone finds that ringtone, let me know.


Heroes of Contentiousness #9: Transformers

Transformers @ Amazon

When it was announced that Michael Bay would be directing a movie based on a toy from the 1980s, the world got a little stupider. There’s no going back from that day — we now live in the post-Bay-Transformers world. Pay attention, and you’ll notice everyone’s a little slower. A little dumberer. It don’t even matter if you seen that movie! LOL!

But, smart doesn’t always mean good, and though the damage done to humanity’s collective intelligence is not debatable, perhaps the post-Bay-Transformers world is a better one.

The debate has a sizable number of Criticker users on either side, with an FCQ of 48.29… that’s Film Contentiousness Quotient (details here). No one is arguing for the film’s artistic merit, so the questions are: Are morphing machines cool, or lame? Does Bay blow stuff up good, or bad? Is Shia LeBouf the brightest young actor of his generation, or the most annoying?

I would answer those questions: Lame, Good, Bright. That’s 2 out of 3 in favor of Transformers, so I’m voting GREAT. We know you’ve seen the movie (don’t lie), so make sure to vote this week:

Transformers

  • Terrible! (61%, 11 Votes)
  • Great! (39%, 7 Votes)

Total Voters: 18

Loading ... Loading ...
 

Here are a couple battling opinions from Criticker users.

BattleToad: “Though the acting is often over the top, it’s often warranted. After all, it’s not like they were going for all out realism. The CG is flawless and works very well with the practical effects. Above all else, Transformers has non-stop entertainment with solid pacing and excellent action. Most importantly, for fans like myself, it’s quite true to the source. Finally, it’s possibly the best work of director Michael Bay, who clearly focused on what he’s best at: visual flare. Awesome!”

JohnCrichton: “Disjointed story, needless characters, poorly formed CGI Transformers (with bad voice acting minus Optimus), weak storyline with needless extra story lines, pointless action and overall a typical Michael Bay disaster.”

And last week’s poll is closed, on Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Dead Man’s Chest. It was close — but by just one vote you voted that it was TERRIBLE.

 

Just to prove that we don’t always have to disagree, here are two more films that are the opposite of contentious:
Unanimously Crap (FCQ 0.27): Bringing Down the House. Steve Martin vs Queen Latifah!! And the results are… miserable.
Unanimously Sweet (FCQ 2.49): Sunset Blvd.. Billy Wilder’s undisputed masterpiece.

Choke: Red Band Trailer

… tee-hee … Hey, wanna see something dirty?

Of course you do, you naughty monkey! Check out the trailer for the new film Choke, due in cinemas XXX. But please, not if you’re a child or a prude.


What would Jesus not do?

Choke, which opens on September 26th, stars the always entertaining Sam Rockwell and is based on a story by Chuck Palahniuk — the writer of Fight Club. It’s gotten great advance reviews, and won the Special Jury Prize at Sundance. Plus: it has a sweet soundtrack. We can’t wait!


Neglected Gems: Barren Lives

Barren Lives @ Amazon

Barren Lives (Vidas Secas) is based on a classic Brazilian novel of the same name. This highly-praised film, adapted and directed by Nelson Pereira dos Santos was a pinnacle of Brazil’s “New Wave Cinema” — an attempt at social relevance and upheaval by filmmakers of the 60s.

The film — similar to The Grapes of Wrath — is not a lighthearted one. Shot documentary-style in black-and-white, it concerns the plight of an extremely poor family, and the lengths to which they must go in order to survive. It’s a stark picture of the poverty which was (and still is) present in north-eastern Brazil. Dos Santos is clearly angry about social injustice, and his film attacks it brutally, pulling no punches.

Though it’s not necessarily a laugh-fest, Barren Lives is a must for any serious cinephile. What else but high art could inspire sentences like this? “The seminal film of the [Brazilian new wave] movement is as naturalistic and heart wrenchingly earnest as any Vittorio De Sica weepie” (Aaron Hillis, Premiere), or: “With its telling compositions, subjective shots, and atomized overexposed lighting, [Barren Lives] now seems relentlessly subjective, keyed to the unarticulated anger of a people aware of its exploitation yet politically too embryonic to consider revolt” (Fernando F. Croce, Slant)?!

Letter Movie Quiz

letter-movie-quizz

Take the quiz here and show off your knowledge at the Criticker forums. Which of you can guess them all?

[via: ehrensenf]

DVD Report – August 12th

An interesting collection of lesser-known films is out this week on DVD, and the pick of the bunch appears to be Guy Maddin‘s unique Brand Upon the Brain — an unclassifiable silent film which enjoyed a great critical reception. Criticker users also enjoyed the more traditional fare served up by Marianne Faithfull in Irina Palm — a film about a widow who finds herself working in the sex industry.

Smart People41 Rankings – Average Tier 5.07
Into the life of a widowed professor comes a new love and an unexpected visit from his adopted brother. (imdb) Smart People @ Amazon

CJ723 Rankings – Average Tier 4.52
A poor Chinese laborer learns important lessons after his son gets a strange new toy. (imdb) CJ7 @ Amazon

Brand Upon the Brain!20 Rankings – Average Tier 6.80
Equal parts childhood reminiscence, Expressionist horror film, teen detectived serial, and Grand Guignol reverie, Brand upon the Brain! is a new cinematic spectacle from the unique mind of Canada's own Guy Maddin. (thefilmcompany.org) Brand Upon the Brain! @ Amazon

Irina Palm19 Rankings – Average Tier 5.47
Maggie, a 50-year-old widow – still faithful to her dead husband, desperately needs some money to pay for a medical treatment for her ill grandson. After several unfruitful attempts to find a job, Maggie finds herself roaming the streets of London Soho. Her eye is caught by a small poster in the window of a ‘shop’ called “Sexy World” which reads: “Hostess wanted”. Too desperate and lost to realize what she does she enters… (imdb) Irina Palm @ Amazon

Felon10 Rankings – Average Tier 6.00
A family man convicted of killing an intruder must cope with life afterward in the violent penal system. Felon @ Amazon

Waz7 Rankings – Average Tier 2.86
A series of deaths have started occurring in New York; Some are being found mutilated while others have an equation wΔz = Cov (w,z) = ÃwzVz carved onto their skin. As police investigate they discover each victim was forced to choose between sacrificing their own life or a loved ones’ life. Before long it becomes clear that this perpetrator has suffered just such a similar fate… (imdb -suspicious) Waz @ Amazon

Goodbye, Bernie Mac

… we hardly knew you.

At the young age of 50, Bernie Mac has passed away from complications of pneumonia. He was probably best known from his self-monikered television show The Bernie Mac show, though he had a strong presence in cinema, too, as one of the stars of Ocean’s Eleven through Thirteen.

If you’ve got a little time and are feeling sentimental, check out this clip of Bernie from The Original Kings of Comedy — one of his highest rated films among the users of Criticker. Hilarious.

Bernie is still set to appear, post-humously with Samuel L. Jackson in “Soul Men” and with John Travolta in “Old Dogs”.

It’s tragic, and always shocking when rich celebrities die from illnesses as ordinary as pneumonia. The loss came as a surprise to his family and friends… and we’ll all miss the comedy that Bernie still had left in him.