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Archive for November 25th, 2009

Horrible Amateur Twilight Merchandise

My brother, a Hardy-quoting literary sophisticate, is a high-school English teacher. By the demand of his students, he’s had to read and critically discuss all of Stephanie Meyer’s meisterwerks, something I believe directly related to his recently confessed contemplation of suicide.


Ain’t no party like a PDF party!

But Thomas Hardy never inspired legions of fans to create kitschy homemade Tess of the d’Urbervilles merchandise. Suck it, you loquacious windbag!

Here, according Pop Hangover, are the 10 worst Twilight items available on Etsy. Enjoy.

- Free Mp3s from Amazon

DVD Report – November 25th

Uwe Boll, you mad genius! Far Cry is your swan song. Your Citizen Kane. Don’t let the derision of the Criticker community get you down! That hilariously low average tier is merely a reflection of popular ignorance. You know as well as I that a film based on a videogame, starring Til Schweiger and featuring genetically modified soldiers is good by default. Screw ‘em all.

Angels & DemonsAverage Tier 4.56
Harvard symbologist Robert Langdon works to solve a murder and prevent a terrorist act against the Vatican. Angels & Demons @ Amazon

Funny PeopleAverage Tier 5.87
When comedian George Simmons learns of his terminal health condition, his desire to form a genuine friendship cause him to take a green performer under his wing as his opening act. Funny People @ Amazon

GomorraAverage Tier 5.86
An inside look at Italy’s modern-day crime families. Based on a book by Roberto Saviano. Gomorra @ Amazon

Four ChristmasesAverage Tier 3.44
A couple struggle to visit all four of their divorced parents on Christmas Day. Four Christmases @ Amazon

Far CryAverage Tier 1.70
Jack Carver, a former member of the Special Forces takes the journalist Valerie Cardinal to an Island to visit her uncle Max who is working in a Military complex on the Island. As they arrive Valerie gets captured by the minions of Doctor Krüger. Jack does not care about her until his boat explodes. After the destruction of his boat Jack finds out about the true purpose of the Facilities on the Island, which is the creation of genetically modified soldiers. (Wikipedia) Far Cry @ Amazon

- Amazon Black Friday Week DVD Sale