Mini-Review: I'm not above hypocrisy, so this has to be said. FUCK your nostalgia. Sure, I want to bang 16 year-old sea creatures as much as the next guy, but that doesn't make this good. Shit like this pumped into every little girl's brain is why most women are shallow cunts (except my mother, she is a saint). It's ok if you're 8, otherwise do the world a favor and just watch some porn instead of being a pedophile.

Mini-Review: I love Chris Farley. I give this extra points because it is his best movie. I have said before I have the emotional range of a grizzly bear, but his biography really touched me because I've got a lot in common with him aside from doing hard drugs. Everyone should watch this at least once just to see physical comedy at its finest with Chris.

Mini-Review: This is some awesome shit. I am serious, watch it. If you are having trouble at least force yourself to watch it through the ice pipe scene. You'll know exactly what I am talking about when you see it.

Mini-Review: I loved the soundtrack. The acting and directing were ok. That makes up all 45 points. That said, fuck Christopher McCandless. What a fucking tool. Being from Alaska, we use this guy as the butt of wilderness survival jokes...well him and the Grizzly Man. He didn't fail at self reliance and died in the wilderness, he died because he was a fucking idiot. Talk about the philosophy of this all you want, I'm gonna stick with all the philosophers dating back to Plato who believe in civilization.

Mini-Review: Not enough can be said about the greatness of this film. The laughs, the tears, the emotions: all work seamlessly with the characters. The real star though is everything but that. The writing, directing, cinematography, and the glorious soundtrack. It all perfectly ensnares you and before you know it, you laugh with Tommy, hope for Jimmy, and cheer for Henry. The time flies by and leaves you with one of the most satisfying cinematic experiences you will ever have.