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The Worst 10 Films of 2013

2013 is just about over, and it’s time to look back on the year that was. We’ve compiled a list of the best and the worst films, as chosen by the users of Criticker. These are selected from the 289 movies up for 2013’s Best Picture Oscar, which have at least 50 rankings at Criticker. We’ll start with the stinkers. Ladies and gentlemen, we present to you the worst films of the year.

10. The Smurfs 2 – 2.7294 Average Tier

“Begins with Smurfette being cast out of the compound. She reconnects with her real family and experiences a few days of true happiness before falling into Gargamel’s schemes (a cycle sadly common to victims of traumatic abuse). The movie ends on a downbeat note when Papa Smurf re-initiates Smurfette into the commune, along with her whole family. Probably the bleakest and hard-to-watch examination of the human condition and the victim/abuser cycle since Requiem for a Dream.” – misterlizard

9. After Earth – 2.7231 Average Tier

“Everything on this planet has evolved to kill humans…except the plants, birds, hogs, and buffalo. In fact most things won’t try to kill you. You’ll be fine unless you throw rocks like a dick.” – SirStuckey

8. Runner Runner – 2.5952 Average Tier

“This film will have audiences running from the theaters. Seriously though, I don’t know what the hell this is. It’s terrible. There’s no reason to care about any of it. There’s no idea behind it. It’s one of those films that comes off as if its made by people who have only vaguely heard second hand what a film is. Strange to think this is from the director of Lincoln Lawyer, which was decent.” – Rufflesack

7. Grown Ups 2 – 2.5496 Average Tier

“This isn’t offensive in terms of bad taste (it’s so tame high schoolers covertly pour beer out rather than drink it), but it is offensive in terms of mean-spirited stereotyping. Men are infantile jackasses, women are sex objects and/or harpies, and small-towners are pathetic grotesques. It’s lazy in every way, from the dispirited performances to the vapid script to the ho-hum direction. Adam Sandler seems to hold his audience in complete contempt, and if this is a hit, no wonder. 2013’s worst.” – xacviant

6. The Big Wedding – 2.5263 Average Tier

“My tolerance for mediocre rom-com is far higher than most, I’ve found, but even I was majorly disappointed by the incongruous and tiresome combination of dramatic tedium and ‘edgy’ vulgarity on display here. Skip it, even if you love De Niro — wait. *Especially* if you love De Niro.” – Wezzo

5. A Good Day to Die Hard – 2.4362 Average Tier

“All that’s left of the franchise is all the references to the original. It actually hurt to watch it at times. Seems like these days no one is able to make an action film with ambitions anymore…” – Bunken

4. Texas Chainsaw 3D – 2.1707 Average Tier

“If you’re gonna take liberties with a well documented franchise, at least get the logistics right. This film picks up the same night that the original movie ends…August 19th, 1973. That was 40 years ago, but for some reason, Heather is only in her 20’s now. Do people not even think anymore when making movies? Also, are we to believe that Heather conveniently forgets that Leatherface just slaughtered her friends and lives in a pit of gore, but she’s ok with that because they are family? FFS!!!” – Jerky

3. Movie 43 – 2.1597 Average Tier

“This movie is such a shame. The idea of a comedy anthology with a whole bunch of stars in it is a great idea. This end result is godawful. Were some of the shorts better than others? Of course. But were any of them actually good? No. Not a single one. There were small bits that werenÂ’’t a complete waste of time, but not many. Far too much immature, lame humour without a bit of taste. I imagine most of the actors involved regret doing this. I know I regret watching it.” – damil

2. A Haunted House – 2.0532 Average Tier

“This movie is like literally 50% rape jokes.” – axleblaze

1. The Last Exorcism Part II – 2.0000 Average Tier

“It could be subtitled “Ashley Bell Wanders Around for a Couple Hours Looking at Scary Things.” Bland and unimaginative, and it refuses to make any good use of its New Orleans locale. Decidedly minor league stuff, not worth anyone’s time. And I quite liked its predecessor…” – Superargo

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4 Responses to “The Worst 10 Films of 2013”

  1. 1 edkrak

    New blog post finally. 🙂 It’s interesting to see such lists at the end of the year, but as usual I’m wondering what’s the point of using Oscar eligible lists as a base. Wouldn’t it make more sense to filter Criticker for 2013 in (for example) Well-known to Very popular category? The way it’s done now we have some films with impressive averages missing – Scary movie 5 (1.40), Celal ile Ceren (1.91) etc.

  2. 2 comepelicula

    Nice list of movies to be aware of, i’ll think twice when someone tells me: Why don’t we watch ‘Grown Ups 2’ for laughs or a scary movie like ‘The Last Exorcism Part II’?.
    Interesting thing is 5 out of 10 of these movies are secuels or part of a franchise, we can learn on what happens when money comes before ideas.

  1. 1 Criticker’s Twenty Best Films of 2013: #11-20 at Criticker Movie Blog
  2. 2 Criticker’s Twenty Best Films of 2013: #1-10 at Criticker Movie Blog

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