Hellraiser

Probably the goriest domestic drama ever. Just baaaarrrrely avoids falling into camp by playing the super-dark material completely straight. All the guys acting like the female lead is super hot when she's a middle-aged 5 at best. Pinhead, like Jason before him, doesn't figure much into this first entry in his series. They clearly didn't have the budget to show the house burning down, so they dissolved to a bunch of nice little campfires instead. It's OK.

There’s some gross parts like when Andrew Robinson gets a smooch. Parental advisory for this on IMDb was a wild ride: “Man holds niece, likely liking the embrace for sexual reasons”. I know if I open this puzzle box I’m going to have my balls ripped off with hooks by stupid English sex demons but maybe, just maybe that won’t happen.

Try as a you might, it is not possible to entirely hate a film that ends with a man suspended by meat hooks sunken into his flesh, high on some desperately bizarre s/m ecstasy, who, as his final words on this earth, before being dragged back to hell and torn apart - muscle by muscle - exclaims: "Jesus wept". Also, the Xenobites are pretty cool.

Lots of "ideas" in this one, which automatically gives it a leg up on just about every "classic '80s slasher" out there. Pretty fucking gross, too. I'm not much of a gore fan, but if glistening, bloody tendons is your thing, this thing will get you off, no problem. I'm selling it a short, though. As a guy who loves the goofy awfulness of many of the F13 and Elm Street sequels (excluding Dream Warrios and Jason Lives, which are legit great), it's refreshing to see a movie that's actually trying.

You spend the entire movie waiting for Pinhead to show up and when he finally does barely figures. Also needed to better utilise Andrew Robinson's creep factor. Only character designs, nothing else.