Knights

1001 Arabian cyborgs led by Lance Henriksen trot the globe in search of the blood of human beings, as only this can power their "witty one-liner" circuits which were installed in the legendary Schwarzenegger era. When not battling renegade cyborgs designed to look like confederate-state heart-throb Kris-fucking-Kristofferson, Henriksen is chatting with Skeletor via a rotating golden dildo. Funfact: in Japanese, "Pyun" is the sound an ejaculated liquid makes when traveling a long distance.

Fun idea for a b-flick but poor execution (blame that on Mr. Pyun) drags this down a bit.

Shitty low budget B-movie about a post apocalyptic future where the humans are enslaved by a race of kung fu fighting vampire cyborgs, and one kick ass girl who fights them all. I saw this once on TV years ago coming down from acid and I refused to believe it was real. Not only is it real, it somehow stars Kris Kristofferson and Lance Henriksen. A total cheesefest, but an entertaining oddity.

I hope Kristofferson and Henriksen were well-paid to be in this. PUKE