Machete Kills

Machete don't watch sequels.

A few moments of genuine radness surrounded by cheap looking silliness that tries way too hard. More or less what an action movie from The Asylum would be like if they weren't the worst at everything.

I was a big fan of the first one, but I didn't dig this one much. Too messy, too many characters, too many double-crosses, and worst of all, no ending. A number of enjoyably cheesy and gory villain deaths, but not much else to recommend.

Very disappointed in this movie. I really enjoyed the first one, but this one just became a parody of itself.

...my enjoyment the longer it plods on.

More polished than the first, whatever that might mean. The cast was better, it had higher production values, it was sillier, featured more action, bigger set pieces, dumb sci-fi elements, Mel Gibson as a villain, etc. Satisfying in the moment if you go with it, but mostly stupid.

You didn't come to see a complex morality tale full of heartrending realism, no, you came to witness Machete slice a guy's gut open and hurl his intestines at a helicopter's rotating blades. Granted, I saw this with a friend of mine and was pretty baked, but I had a good enough time.

A poor Star Wars on Earth adaptation. The story was like a dismembered body. Not a clue where it was going, not a clue were it was coming. A must Lady Gaga screen premier.

Has more of everything that made the first one great but still manages to be a far worse movie.

Machete was a cool trailer in search of a film, and the sequel is really no different. What it lacks is the sense of controlled chaos that made Eisener's Hobo With A Shotgun such an exhilarating action packed thrill ride of gore and mayhem. Machete Kills relies too heavily on the considerable presence of Trejo and the revolving door of star cameos to make up for its creative deficit. Rodriguez is quite skilled at making enjoyable trash, but this is hardly a showcase for his talent.

This movie is really boring compared to its predecessor and is 20 minutes to long! There are far to many chracters to care about any of them and the fun is sucked out of it with the rubbish plot. Considering some of the directors previous work this is just disapointing!

Machete Kills was always on the cards and it's just more of the same. All that differentiates this sequel from it's predecessor is the addition of even more familiar faces. The first film was a tolerable novelty, but this inevitable sequel just milks what was initially a harmless idea. It's worth a watch for the ridiculously over the top set pieces alone. And it's fun I suppose to see the likes Gibson, Sheen, Banderas & Gaga popping up alongside Trejo. But otherwise it's completely forgettable.

For as much as I love Machete, the follow up just doesn't do it. The concept of the modern Grindhouse appeals to me on so many levels, but I could never get into this one. Maybe the idea was too ridiculous? Things just kept escalating and happening that it was comical. Mel Gibson and Helicopter Machete were awesome but that was about it. Although if they were to actually make Machete Kills Again... In Space I would see the shit out of it (because that shit would be straight comedy).

This did not need to be made.

Bloated and disappointing, but, well, Rod already did this when he filled his Mariachi trilogy with too many characters and plot twists. We all get the badass elements of Machete's path -- he don't tweet, he don't text, he don't smoke, he will be double-crossed, left for dead, get the women and claim revenge --, but this is the case where the trailer works way better than the feature. Ultraviolence looks just dumb when you have a "serious", part anti-military, part sci-fi plot like this.

Run time is maybe a bit long but I had a blast with this one. Everyone puts in a performance better than expected, the action and plot are suitably over the top and it has a lot of fun with itself. And unlike the last few Grindhouse movies it doesn't TRY to be Grindhouse it just is. Finally.

A lot of fun moments but the promise of Machete Kills Again (In Space) overshadows anything that's going on. So tongue-in-cheek that the tongue comes out the other side, wraps back into the mouth and then out the other cheek.

Machete follows up. Machete repeats gags. Machete relies on stunt casting, which is in itself a repeat gag. Machete credits Charlie Sheen as Carlos Estevez. Machete revels in over-the-top gore, badass fights, cheap effects and exploitation movie clichés, which is fun, but... Machete don't realize that cheap digital effects look more silly than trashy. Machete don't bother with an ending. Machete disappoints.

I'd love to tell you I hated this movie, but it was just way, way too much fun. A shapeshifting character played by Lady Gaga, Walton Goggins *and* Cuba Gooding Jr? Sofia Vergara with some kind of machine-gun dildo? Charlie Sheen as the motherf**king President? You know you'll love it. Embrace it.

Not as good as the first one, but it still had what I wanted & I enjoyed it. Trejo is still a total badass at 69 years old. I liked the bizarre range of supporting actors Rodriguez managed to get. It's also a bit of a negative for the film though, as there are so many of them that it feels a little cluttered. On top of that, the whole thing is a bit too long. It's a fun movie & it doesn't try to be anything else. It's not for everyone, but it is for me. Bring on "Machete Kills Again... In Space".

Machete Kills is a bad movie. Not an intentionally-bad-and-therefore-it's-good movie; just a bad one. Its action isn't terribly impressive, its plot is both predictable and convoluted, while making the film feel disjointed as soon as the real villain shows up, its supporting cast is infinitely more interesting than its hero, and it doesn't even properly end, meaning in order to find out the end to Machete's story, we have to hope that it makes enough money for a sequel to be justified.

This is a rehash but the sauce still eatable.

Big fan of Robert Rodriguez work. Really enjoyed this one.

I liked the 1st Machete better but I can't say this enough damn Amber Heard is hot.

What an unfunny entry. I think Machete is fun for one movie only and after that the over-the-top jokes and action grow old very fast. A few funny scenes with a stellar cast that gets really horrible lines for somewhat interesting characters. Positive points for Trejo, Michelle Rodriquez, Lady Gaga, Tom Savini, Walton Goggins, and Charlie Sheen (as the president of the United States). Minus points for Amber Heard and Elon Musk. Yikes.

Oh fuck off Musk.

Really not interested.

So bad it's... just bad.

Machete does indeed kill, but not really in a humorous way. I didn't have high hopes for this one. I enjoyed the first Machete quite a bit and this one has a few good moments. It just didn't make me laugh much...

First off I'm not a fan of making a shitty movie on purpose but even taking that into account this is a shitfest.

Come on, really, what the fuck, This is a movie that is clearly made for those who enjoyed the first. If you liked the original, there really is no reason not to enjoy this as well (may be slightly inferior but still has the same heart). I never understand in this day and age of internet that if you didn't like an original of a flick what would possess you to watch a sequel and then bitch and complain.

The whole thing's pretty much setup for the next one, so if part three doesn't get made, this'll pretty much be the most superfluous movie in history. It's really, really cool, though. Robert Rodriguez and I get along very well. I could pretty much live inside his movies. This one's zippier, more coherent, and overall just much more fun to watch than its scattershot predecessor. I can't help it; I loved it.

Waste of a good cast.

Great for those times when all you really want is cheesiness and gore. You can't exactly have huge expectations here, people, geez. I got quite a few giggles out of it, isn't that all you really need out of an exploitation flick?

Disappointing. The trailer for the sequel at the start of the film was the most entertaining thing about this film. That actually has me looking forward to the sequel if there is going to be one. I liked the original Machete quite a bit, this one is kind of like it, but a lot worse. I think terrible plot and writing are the main problems here. It also repeats a lot of stuff, I lost count of how many times the 'Machete don't text' line was repeated here with slight variations. Tedious film.

This won't be the last we'll see of Machete if the movie is successful. The flick featured a pair of embedded trailers for the proposed third installment: Machete Kills Again ... in Space. And the more people watch Machete kill, the more I wonder: Is there a danger in forgetting that violence--real violence--isn't funny at all? (pluggedin.com)

For the first "Machete" i wrote that the strenght of that movie was in the perfect merge between parody and action, and i rate it very high. Here, also due the loss of freshness, this perfect mix is broken, the climax can't overcome itself without become silly, and if the first film was borderline between being trashy and good, but remaining in the "good" part, "Machete kills" trespass in the trashy territory often. Anyway, i am a fag of the "trash but funny" movie, so i like it.

Don't let the cast fool you. It still stinks. It gets better towards the end, but it's a bit weird how the last third feels so different than the first two.

fun fun fun!

Wie toll wäre ein richtiger Film mit diesem Gesicht! Ich empfehle statt Machete Kills eine Talkshow mit Danny Trejo auf youtube zu schauen. Das hat mehr Humor als der Film!

So bad it's good? Not sure, but it was pretty entertaining on a stupid level.

Big borefest

good movie

is this supposed to be a tribute, a homage, or a parody? what the hell is this? an hour and a half of robert rodriguez laughing at his own jokes and being coddled by the cast, it would seem. "machete don't text" was good in the first one. what machete does and "don't" gets played to death in this one. marko zaror being in it was my favorite part.

Complete schlock, but goddamn do I love this movie. It's a blast.

1184: what the fuck it this!

awesome 10 out of 10

Machete lose sense of fun from original and becomes too self aware.

The joke is getting old, just as fast, as Rodriguez is getting lazy, but thanks to some random weirdness, the end result wasn't a total failure.

It is still the very same campy movie that prefers style over substance and non-sense comical relief over serious story. though the comic cohesion that made the first movie fun and outrageously funny had gone stale over time.partly its due to a relentless pursuit of telling the same dirty joke and raunchy humor."Machete Kills" had rather became dull gradually and eventually.