Once Before I Die

I know I probably throw around 'laughably bad' a bit too often, but this film really takes the cake. Ursula Andress, who is far more concerned about her puppies than the Japanese invasion of the Philippines, gets dragged along with a group of soldiers who all have less than pure feelings for her. Wooden acting galore, baffling plot, and a final act is flagrantly dumb. Movies don't get much worse.

John Derek began his acting career playing killer Nick Romano in the noir classic Knock on Any Door (1949). He ended it playing Capt Bailey, the graying handsome leader of the 26th Calvary in the, so good it should be classic, war film Once Before I Die (1966). Bailey makes one of the damned film entrances of any character in a war film. The year is 1941, the setting the Philippines right before Japanese attack. Bailey and his men are in a large field on horseback playing polo to pass the time.