Pinocchio

*sigh* We're still doing these, huh? Besides being simply unnecessary (as all these Disney remakes are), this one completely muddles the morals of the original. Skipping school is bad - but here, they kick him out first. Lying is bad - but here, it's also necessary, because it's how Pinocchio ultimately escapes his cage. Smoking is bad - but we can't show characters doing that in 2022, so... I guess root beer is just as bad? The modified ending is infuriating. Trash.

Like most of this series of Disney live action remakes, this is aggressively a PRODUCT, not the expression of artists. “Live action” is pushing it, actually - this is only marginally more a live action film than the Lion King remake; it’s more a CGI toon that the occasional green screened live actor walks through. The CGI cat Figaro in particular never appears to be in any scene in any way that has convincing weight. I will give a smidge of credit for keeping the donkey transformation scary.

This contends with all the typical Disney remake issues of superfluous additions and outright undermining of the original, but it’s compounded by shamefully bad VFX and some truly ghastly performances from nearly the entire cast (Joseph Gordon-Levitt in particular delivers the most embarrassing work I’ve seen in years). This is shrieky, haphazard children’s “entertainment” at its worst.

The magic is gone. This film offers almost nothing new or interesting to anyone who's already seen the 1940 film, which is all of us. But not only that, the things that are different probably shouldn't have been.

Well, that was a crock of- okay, it tries to retell the classic 1940 version and sometimes to shore up some of the plot holes or leaps that are in it, but for any one it manages to address marginally, it creates many more. The addition of the Stromboli puppeteeress is completely unnecessary and throws the whole segment off. The anthropomorphization of Honest John just looks uneven and weird. It throws a few modern/recent refs in as gags that distract more than add. Won't be rewatching this.

Pinocchio offers the worst of both worlds. When not recreating famous images from the classic 1940 film, it attempts to liven up the original Disney version with touches like Honest John calling Pinocchio an “influencer.” The elements that imitate the old make this feel like an awkward imitation. But most of the new elements — particularly the new songs by Alan Silvestri and Glen Ballard but also touches like Pinocchio water skiing — don’t work either.

It's somewhat okay but the pacing is just terrible, way too long. Doesn't offer anything that the original didn't already do (and better). It also fails thematically too, just a boring mess.

Disturbing and weird--as PINOCCHIO should be!--but a visual and tonal mess. I think Tom Hanks actually gives one of the best performances we've yet seen in any of these highly unnecessary Disney live-action remakes.

Wishing on a star that Zemeckis would be a real director again. Geppeto meticulously carving a huge circumcised dick.

A lazy, creatively bankrupt, ugly remake of a movie I never liked in the first place; and on top of that it manages to miss the morale of the original story.

This is a quite charming live action remake of the classic Disney film. I loved Tom Hanks as Gepetto - he's the perfect person to play that role, I feel. There's some pretty decent CGI featured in this film and it was nice to see the songs I remember from when I saw the original (film) as a child. I'd forgotten some details of the story but I enjoyed watching it again and I hope it finds a new audience of young fans.

This should have been so much better. It's not bad but it isn't that good either.

Meh, couldn't finish it

I've always found Pinocchio to be amongst Disney's weaker entries, feeling more like a collection of short stories than the odyssey it is presented as. This "live-action" remake does nothing to improve that perception & somehow manages to have less life than the original. The film has no distinct style or voice. The dance numbers look like everyone's going through the motions. Gordon-Levitt does a Jack McBrayer impression. LLoyd's performance was painful. Worst of all, the film was boring.

Jsingsintro:)+nicesympathythenherhymedtoomuchthenwasmeh-loveJ/Poften-foxokay/meh-getstoochildish+stayswoodencuzmovieaboutrealinheartetc

Meh. Overall just too wacky. Tom Hanks was brilliant but could not save the show.

Visually beautiful, but slow and emotionally simplistic.

Not an irredeemable failure, but still certainly a failure. Never has an actor looked so detached from the green-screen shenanigans going on around them than Hanks does in this film.

I didn't think it was all that bad. Just really pointless.

Ünlü Pinokyo masalının bilmem kaçıncı uyarlanması. Zaten her sene ya filmini yada animasyonu çekiliyor. Sinemacılar bu masalı seviyor. Öğrenim tezi mi nedir? Robert Zemeckis tarafından uyarlanan çocuk filmimiz, gerçek dünyanın ne olduğunu öğrenen Pinokyo uyarlaması. Görsel efektler ve müzikler şahane. Kötü alışkanlıklar olduğu için kötü eleştirilecek. Filmin sonunda, deniz canavarı. Dedim pinokyo hayırdır. Senin burnun niye havada?

Mirror, mirror on the wall Why did this Pinocchio remake have to suck balls? In honor of Disney+ Day, the company uses this opportunity to once again exploit our nostalgic heartstrings for profit. Another entry in a long, continuous line of Disney's insane reaches for live-action remakes, Pinocchio is more than a movie that has no soul or heart. It's a movie that spends the entire running time with strings attached.

In the original, Pinocchio was in danger because he made the wrong decisions with his life. In this one, he's in danger because the school was racist and he had no choice. Also, he gets out of the cage with the "wearing ladies underwear" scene from Shrek 2

not so good

“Pinocchio” is a sad example of Hollywood’s worst tendencies when it comes to modern blockbuster filmmaking. While Tom Hanks manages to bring some charm to the film, it’s not enough to make up for the film's overall lack of creativity and visual effects that feel unfinished.