Road to Revenge

One of two insane vanity projects I watched in the course of one day (the other being Partners). The horrifically sketchy nature of the entire thing is tempered by the fact that it is so so embarrassing. That this even exists is more inspiring to me than the real life story of 127 Hours or the fictional story of The Martian. Evidently nothing is stopping me from making a movie other than me.

This top-self "Black Tank-Top" vanity project is the beautiful "so-bad-it's-good" byproduct of John De Hart's delusional ego. Naturally John De Hart stars, wrote, co-directed, produced, and did the music for this action B-movie mess. Never is this more obvious than during his musical performance, or the multitude of nude scenes with Pamela Jean Bryant. Although the alcoholic Wings Hauser steals the movie with his drunken rants, still only to be recommended to fans of this niche sub-genre.

How long is the bathtub sex scene? BillyShears shrieks, "It's longer than you think, criticker! Longer than you think!" before clawing his eyes out as he is wheeled away from his horrified family by several attendants.

Champagne and Bullets cut. Like Samurai Cop. Lawyer/producer/writer/director/lead John De Hart's auditions for Hollywood/Nashville; why not sex scenes w/Playboy model. Poor lines ("we love Satan" repeatedly) and poor read (is he reading his lines from a teleprompter?). Wings Hauser method acting a drunk. At least we're spared a drawn out boss battle. Arrow to the neck of the henchman who then leaps off the roof is funny. Fav scene: deadpan singing on stage with the white man lean-shuffle.

Easily one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen and yet it had my undivided attention from start to finish. So many scenes not only went on far too long but often had me asking myself if the film was really going there. Every time it really was going there and then some. I want to score this incredibly high because it was an incredible experience. But I just can’t do that in good conscience.

pretty hilarious musical revenge movie, dang normad

The only reason to watch this is Wings Hauser and only a few will want to do that.

A fascinating monument to egocentrism in general, and an invaluable insight into the male psyche in the 1990's. John de Hart wrote, directed, starred in and scored (oh, it's a glorious score) what could pass equally as a meta-commentary on a certain kind of film, or one of its most outrageous, testosterone fuelled examplars. Most notable is how aesthetic the film is, possessing its own form of beauty. Definitely a piece of art.

Awful, boring, not worth anyone's time.

I wanted to like this vanity project, I really did. Despite it's handful of crying-I-was-laughing-so-hard moments, it's mostly a bore.