Tales from the Crypt Presents: Bordello of Blood

Dennis Miller proves to be the heroic lead that Jimmy Fallon couldn't quite duplicate in Taxi. That's one of the most depressing things I've ever written. Early Miller had a smarm sniper rifle that only effected his target, whereas Bill Maher seems more prone to smarm carpet bombing. But in all honesty, is this better than Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death? Damned if I know, kemo sabe. All I know is when you're making those kind of calls, you're up in the high country.

Dennis Miller is so obnoxious that no amount of boobies can save this from being pretty terrible. (Okay maybe a little bit)

To be fair, the target audience of horny teenage boys looking for a cocktail of T&A, comedy and monsters should find this diverting enough for a late Friday night. I know I would have. Everyone else should be mildly grateful for the odd choice the filmmakers made for leading man: Dennis Miller isn't much of an actor, but neither is anyone else and the only wisecracks that ever hit are obviously his. It would be infinitely tougher to sit through if the only comedy came from the screen writers.

It's a bad film that's difficult to defend, but it has always been a guilty pleasure. Miller can't act, but it doesn't matter. He is amusing to watch as a smug low rent detective completely out of his depth. Eleniak is dull, but the rest of the cast hams it up appropriately, with Sarandon having a ball as a pompous televangelist and Everhart sexing it up as the vampire queen. The jokes are juvenile and corny, but there is a heavy gore and T+A quotient to keep my inner adolescent happy.

The film starts off so strong. Feldman does a great job, and the film really feels like cheap fun b-horror. Then Miller shows up, and the whole thing becomes nonsensical. This could have worked with Miller's smark, but we didn't get that. I remember that when I was 8, the neighbour kid (who was a year younger) bragged that his parents let him watch this.

Dennis Miller...action hero? On second thought....

The comedy isn't funny and the horror isn't scary. It's blah the whole way through. To think I actually used to like Dennis Miller...

::shrug:: Hey, look! Corey Feldman.

An entertaining B-style flick which doesn't take itself so serious and that is what makes it work. Lots of violence, gore, and nudity yay! Some of the humour and acting is hit and miss, but it's all fine. Stop being so serious and nit picky and enjoy.

really wanted to like it, but it couldn't. A few funny bits, but as a whole, not worth the time.

Funny in a mild sort of way, gory in a mild sort of way...it's okay. Dennis Miller in top form, which isn't saying much since his movie work is pretty bad. Very beautiful women however.

No clue why I liked this back in the day

Naked babes but that's about it

crap

This movie was so forgettable that I can't remember if Dennis Miller dies. That says it all. Also, fuck Dennis Miller.

Fitfully amusing juveni,e horror comedy with a heavy t&a quotient.

The second installment in the Tales from the crypt movies. Slightly cheesier and less cool than its predecessor, Demon Knight. The cheese is a plenty, the gore is in overload and in this one we get bucket loads of tits. Too bad they're all nasty vampire tits. Pretty much a decent hour anda half long Tales from the crypt episode,

funny but a meh movie good fot killin time

Dennis Miller is the only reason that I gave this the score that I did. It's pretty blah.

fun!

Poor.

Fails as horror. Fails as camp. It doesn't even live up to the standards of the series, which are pretty low. The dialog and "jokes" are cringe worthy, and Dennis Miller's smug class clown act is absolutely horrible. God I hate that man. The only good thing about this movie is a handful of decent gore effects.

good movie

I enjoyed every moment of this movie.

You get to see some nice boobies, but not a great movie

Dennis Miller?

Miller is decent. The rest is bad.