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Van Helsing

Van Helsing

2004
Fantasy
Action
2h 11m
Gabriel Van Helsing (Jackman) is a man cursed with a past he cannot recall and driven by a mission he cannot deny. Charged by a secret organization to seek out and defeat evil the world over, his efforts to rid the world of its nightmarish creatures have been rewarded with the title that now follows him: murderer. (Universal Pictures)
Your probable score
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Van Helsing

2004
Fantasy
Action
2h 11m
Your probable score
Avg Percentile 25.82% from 10165 total ratings

Ratings & Reviews

(10165)
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Rated 24 Feb 2007
3
0th
Van Helsing's amazing fighting abilities seem to be getting beat up and barely winning any fight he is involved in. That and the movie ends with a pretty terrible CGI fight. Terrible waste of my time.
Rated 14 Aug 2007
24
2nd
Ridiculous story, and a number of characters and scenes are reminiscent of League of Extraordinary Gentlemen-not a good sign. What was supposed to be the most heartwrenching and sympathetic scene made the whole theater cackle at its absurdity-also, a very bad sign.
Rated 20 Aug 2008
25
2nd
Toss it on the dung heap started by Stephen Sommers' Fraser Mummy movies. "More is more" H'wood garbage w/ supernatural beings fought off by non-magical guns and swords (!) and CGI smashed across your face every 5 minutes. Uninspired, unoriginal, & no doubt an easy sell to studio executives. Even Kate Beckinsale's looks fail to alleviate the pain. Better than the Mummy only b/c it has a larger variety of famous monsters for you to sigh impatiently at.
Rated 14 Aug 2007
10
3rd
null
Rated 01 Aug 2007
12
2nd
One of the reasons why you should never trust trailers, this film looked like it'd kick ten kinds of ass when the first spot aired during the Super Bowl. Turns out it bit just as much ass, as the dialogue, kept to a minimum in the marketing, was horrible, and the actual monsters looked like they were culled from an N64 game. A cinematic punch to the nuts.
Rated 05 Dec 2021
30
15th
It's a CGI-fest with screeching monsters, but it's a fun watch-through. I'm constantly mocking Beckinsale's impractical wardrobe and her ability to maintain glamorous amidst otherwise devastating injuries, or Jackman's silly contraptions, or the number of swinging scenes. David Wenham plays a competent sidekick. The werewolf-shedding is a nice idea. Fav scene: werewolf and batcula duking it out with fisticuffs because we can never have enough CG.
Rated 29 May 2011
24
6th
Such an absurd film. Nobody who worked on this has any idea what the laws of physics are, every action scene looked like the worst video game ever. In significant need of more lighting, too. And less explosive carriages. Some extra points for how entertainingly bad it is.
Rated 14 Aug 2007
32
1st
The storyline of "Van Helsing" alone is a giant bad trip. Basically, we have here Dracula trying to capture Frankenstein's monster so that he could spawn thousands of little baby Draculas and Abraham van Helsing's younger brother trying to stop him with a machine-gun crossbow while changing into a werewolf. And the execution is even worse. It's not even "so bad it's good". It's just bad. Unbelievably bad.
Rated 17 Dec 2006
11
1st
Kate Beckinsale doesn't jump from the tops of any buildings in this one as she does in the Underworld movies. This movie is a lot worse than Underworld. See a pattern? NEEDS MORE JUMPING
Rated 27 Dec 2007
5
12th
The instant you see the corny shadow of Dracula on the wall in the opening scene, you know you've been duped by the most misrepresenting ad campaign ever. I was really excited to see this movie. Whoever made the commercials should have made the movie, because those were dark, serious, and exciting looking. Van Helsing is a wretched, cheeseball piece of drivel that no one should see, ever.
Rated 14 Aug 2007
40
14th
Hahahahahaha... Oh wait.
Rated 29 Aug 2008
75
57th
Definitely the darkest of the Van Wilder franchise.
Rated 14 Aug 2007
20
1st
The only time I've ever got to see an entire theatre's audience rebel against what was being shoveled down their throats. It was glorious.
Rated 25 Jul 2012
20
6th
In the world's silliest pixel fight you find yourself without a controller. Well, what else to do then, other than start noticing how the computer generated images aren't really up to snuff. I did like the comment "Why does it smell of wet dog?" although the answer is that it doesn't. It smells of sweaty, fat motion graphics designer.
Rated 02 Mar 2007
15
3rd
My favorite part of this movie is how such a massively large budget produced such a massively bad movie.
Rated 14 Aug 2007
0
0th
This is one MONSTROUSLY bad time at the movies!
Rated 08 Sep 2008
11
2nd
This film was so freaking goofy. I'm sure the dailies came in and the execs said, "Wow, this is bad - let's fix it in post." And then the post-f/x came in and they said, "Damn, this is worse - let's market the hell out of it for an opening weekend and then forget we ever made this." And they did.
Rated 14 Aug 2007
9
1st
This movie makes me really, really angry. I enjoy the cast, but some of the graphics... Eeeep. If I can identify where you get stock images from, or if I can shudder from bad edges, I just won't like the movie!
Rated 30 Aug 2016
73
38th
Kind of appalled how much fun this is. Runs low on gas near the halfway mark but other than that vibrant, invigorating camerawork and a goofy self-aware sense of humor. Roxburgh is the MVP, chewing scenery like he's the villain of the week on Big Wolf on Campus.
Rated 14 Aug 2007
15
2nd
No. This movie bites, and not in the way they intended it to. This is a claims to be a Fantasy, Action, Adventure, Horror film; it should be classified as Comedy.
Rated 19 Jan 2011
2
0th
One of the worst movies I've ever seen.
Rated 16 Sep 2007
15
0th
Useless crap.
Rated 29 Dec 2009
55
47th
Predictable and boring movie.
Rated 22 Jan 2022
73
44th
It’s silly and overlong, and falls to pieces during the numbing CGI-fest of a third act, but still a lot of fun, with Jackman’s stolid Van Helsing and Beckinsale’s overly coiffed heroine balanced by Roxburgh’s delightfully hammy Dracula; he basically steals the film, giving it a much needed shot of energy whenever spirits start to lag. It’s the first act which works best as it gently tips its hat to Bond – love the opening briefing (replete with overheads) by Armstrong’s Cardinal!
Rated 14 Aug 2007
20
1st
Mind-numbing stuff.
Rated 14 Jan 2010
12
6th
Australians don't make for good vampire hunters. Or good vampires, for that matter.
Rated 31 Oct 2007
1
2nd
So loud... "wwwwraraaaaaaar ..waraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa" annoying right ?
Rated 17 May 2008
25
8th
Time for new agents. For everybody.
Rated 14 Aug 2007
63
25th
This movie is just dumb action. Hugh Jackman as Wolverine as Gabriel Van Helsing is a good choice for the hero in this furiously silly monster mash of a film. Don't get me wrong now, I love Hugh, and the rest of the cast isn't bad either. The plot is just too stupid. Comic book fans might have a good laugh with their buds over how they can't believe they watched the whole thing, but everyone else would be wise to avoid it at all costs. Ugh!
Rated 14 Aug 2007
35
10th
Only effect!!!
Rated 14 Aug 2007
42
22nd
Foul and repugnant
Rated 04 Jun 2010
19
10th
The idea was there, and it had great potential, but the plot's reliance on convenience and predictable cliche's REALLY brought it down. God, that doesn't even compare to the godawful pacing and CGI which ruined what could have been awesome action scenes. It's also funny how, if you really consider it, how Sommers essentially rips off his own movies when making Van Hellsing given how much similarities it had with his previous movie The Mummy.
Rated 19 Mar 2007
46
17th
Not really as cool as I was hoping. The trailer was better than the actual movie.
Rated 08 Apr 2007
12
2nd
Utter crap.
Rated 26 Oct 2018
27
2nd
I watched this for Hugh Jackman. He ended up being the best thing about it.
Rated 27 Oct 2014
38
16th
An extremely rare case of the movie licensed game actually being superior to the movie.
Rated 19 Feb 2007
6
0th
Went to see to make fun of it, it was so bad we couldn't speak.
Rated 14 Aug 2007
10
8th
10 for Kate Beckinsale's ass
Rated 10 Jun 2009
68
65th
Very entertaining, a good example of the genre.
Rated 17 Mar 2008
75
10th
As a fan of the classic monster movies, I like the idea of bringing them all together again for this one, and I was prepared to like it even if it wasn't that great. But I really wasn't that enthralled with it. There were a few nice parts--Frankenstein's monster had some nice moments, some sets/scenes/characters were reminiscent of the old horror movies, and the costumes were neat--but I really can't say I liked it much as a whole.
Rated 14 Aug 2007
1
0th
Possibly. The. Most. Disappointing. Movie. Ever.
Rated 19 Jan 2014
5
1st
Unintentionally hilarious......Hugh Jackman, looking well as always
Rated 21 Jan 2010
63
61st
The over-the-top visuals are great, and despite a lack of real substance in the plot or characters the whole film has a very nice polish to it. A fun watch.
Rated 23 Feb 2009
66
28th
Not a great movie really, but I enjoyed it - despite the awful accents.
Rated 30 Jun 2007
15
17th
It does create an atmosphere. And it is the most moster-packed movie in many a decade. But the real reason this belongs in the horror section rather than action / adventure is because it is so very horrible. Best stick with Hellboy, which combines the super-hero and supernatural genres much more effectively.
Rated 01 Feb 2012
51
23rd
Hugh Jackman has me completely won over thanks to two films (The Fountain and The Prestige), but I'm slowly learning that that has more to do with the directors he's working with than with his own ability to pick scripts.
Rated 17 Mar 2008
30
34th
Simply awful. This movie had so much potential and turned out to be a total let-down. Stephen Sommers - Director / Writer / Producer; both Hugh Jackman and Kate Beckinsale in the cast; Count Dracula; Dr. Frankenstein; werewolves; $160M...and this is what we get? Really?
Rated 11 May 2011
13
3rd
Awful in every regard, be it the painfully bland heroes, the unbearably hammy and over-the-top villains, terrible CG effects, weak action and a nonsensical, overstuffed plot that amounts to an expensive, messy bore of a would-be blockbuster.
Rated 27 May 2008
21
0th
dull as dishwater and twice as flimsy
Rated 13 Nov 2012
5
3rd
It's incredible that a movie could have so much promise and be so spectacularly terrible. The absolute worst version of Dracula and Frankenstein you've ever seen, and a complete waste of Hugh Jackman.
Rated 20 Aug 2009
1
2nd
All points go to the set pieces.
Rated 18 Mar 2008
25
5th
The only thing to remember is the stupid ending, when the stupid face of Gabriel's dead love that appears in the sky. Remember it well, and never make the same mistake yourself.
Rated 28 Feb 2008
69
62nd
ok
Rated 12 Jan 2011
79
5th
1
Rated 08 Jun 2022
40
7th
Van Helsing is a messy and erratic CGI fest with muddled lore, terrible humour, and an absent script. There is, however, some redemption to be found in terms of spectacle. Chief of these is this kick-ass werewolf at 3:05: https://youtu.be/uD6xG_hljj4?t=185
Rated 14 Aug 2007
15
21st
A bore-fest. I literally fell asleep. How could you screw this up? It was a fascinating train wreck that forced my brain to shut down so that I could dream something better.
Rated 18 Jul 2008
56
24th
If you saw The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (2003, Sean Connery), then this is pretty much the same thing, only with a collection of villains instead of heroes. Similar quality, too. If you can turn your brain off, it's not too bad.
Rated 27 Jul 2010
68
19th
A corny but entertaining movie.
Rated 13 Sep 2008
70
16th
So bad, it's good!
Rated 24 Feb 2010
95
77th
a bit of cheese, but really fun and the ballroom scene is gorgeous.
Rated 20 Dec 2012
50
11th
Average vampire hunter movie, watch it once.
Rated 21 Nov 2009
60
8th
This movie had so much damn potential, just totally wasted. Story went from sort of silly to completely stupid.
Rated 18 Sep 2010
80
89th
Can you look past a few plot holes and poorly done CGI? Can you tolerate cheesy dialogue? Is an unrelenting pace something you look for in a movie? Can you turn off your brain for a couple hours and just watch and admire what is happening on screen? If the answer to most of those is yes, you'll probably like what Van Helsing has to offer. If the answer is no, then you might as well just skip it, as you will probably feel like you have wasted two hours of your life.
Rated 14 Aug 2007
25
6th
Pretty bad flick...saved a little by Jackman's charasmatic performance, the Frankesntein character, and a great opening scene with Mr. Hyde.
Rated 12 Feb 2010
11
2nd
Mostly forgettable, except that Anna Valerious is one of the worst action heroines ever.
Rated 11 Dec 2006
58
52nd
Hugh is sexy no matter what he's wearing or not wearing.... good story... interesting telling of the tale
Rated 14 Aug 2007
60
19th
It has its moments. I didn't hate it nearly as bad as most critics (or my brother) did. It's a good "falling asleep to" movie.
Rated 10 May 2009
89
63rd
Hugh Jackman and Kate Beckinsdale give a wonderful and fun perfomance.
Rated 07 Oct 2009
40
18th
Only because of Kate Beckinsale's amazing shiny shiny hair.
Rated 30 Aug 2009
45
33rd
Cheesy and way over the top in some places.. but hey, an hour and a half of Kate Beckinsale is worth it.
Rated 29 Dec 2009
45
27th
low in entertainment value, not very exciting
Rated 30 Apr 2008
84
46th
Good film, cool effects. Love the monsters.
Rated 09 Feb 2014
100
0th
good
Rated 14 Aug 2007
50
9th
Van Horking. Its one redeeming feature is half-naked Will Kemp.
Rated 21 Jun 2020
25
6th
Hugh Jackman fudges his way through two hours of children's film no child would put up with, battling CG ghouls with terrifyingly clunky facial expressions and budget Johnny Depp.
Rated 08 Nov 2012
13
1st
One of the most idiotic and incoherent movies I have seen in ages.
Rated 14 Aug 2007
30
11th
Ridiculous, full of craptastic CGI.
Rated 14 Aug 2010
59
11th
Beckinsaves.
Rated 29 Jan 2018
20
4th
One of the rare movies I almost walked out of even though I paid to see it.
Rated 30 Apr 2008
30
28th
boring but the actor..
Rated 11 May 2009
15
3rd
Unbelievably bad.
Rated 15 Feb 2011
47
29th
Just finished watching the movie; didn't even realize Van Helsing was played by Hugh Jackman until reading it here. In any case, he was pretty bad, but I don't think the movie was. Gets a little sleepy every now and again, and it seems like everybody develops super hero powers toward the end, but the action is pretty fun, the CGI effects made me smile, and the customes are kinda neat.
Rated 14 Aug 2007
34
8th
This could have been pretty cool, but it's really corny.
Rated 02 Nov 2010
71
6th
oye vey
Rated 04 Oct 2014
11
25th
Good thing Van Helsing killed all these dudes bc they were really boring.
Rated 02 Sep 2011
39
16th
Is drab the right word? I can't think of another way to describe it.
Rated 12 Dec 2006
60
12th
Decent action, cool setting, mediocre story, tons of plot holes.
Rated 12 Nov 2008
50
12th
Gut gemeinte Tricks eine nette Optik und ein cooler Darsteller machen eben noch keinen tollen Monsterfilm. Die deutsche Synchro zerstört den Rest. Für mich leider ein Flop!
Rated 29 Aug 2007
85
93rd
Kate Beckinsale is hot. 30 points.
Rated 17 Aug 2007
75
34th
Fun in a trashy vampire way. And this is the first movie I remember seeing Hugh Jackman in, so that was a nice discovery.
Rated 27 Apr 2009
62
23rd
Slightly better than Constantine. Still not a reference to its genre, though.
Rated 06 Aug 2009
98
31st
An awesome movie, that everyone should see! Hugh Jackman was at his best in this movie, portraying the monster hunter, Van Helsing. I would have rated this a movie a perfexct 100, if it wasn't for the fact that Kate Beckinsales character died in the end of the film, which just seemed wrong.
Rated 14 Aug 2007
10
13th
Crap! Vampires don't arrouse sexually. They do it when they're feeding. But in this ugly Dracula (!) wants dr.Frankenstein to alive his children !!!! and wolverine saves the day. Crap!
Rated 18 May 2007
15
2nd
Had to chew glass to endure the pain of watching this film.
Rated 25 Sep 2010
41
11th
The plot as I remember it: Dracula needs the electricity from Frankenstein's brain to jump start his egg sacks. Aiding Dracula is a poached Igor, and some evil toothy Jawas. Along the way the Wolfman is added for muscle, and the Creature from the Black Lagoon sublets Dracula's old castle. The whole thing is like a thinking mans "Monster Squad".
Rated 30 Aug 2007
50
18th
I didn't buy Hugh Jackman as Van Helsing and some of the special-effects were iffy.
Rated 16 Feb 2009
1
11th
Very forgettable. I have a hard time getting behind Hugh Jackman in any film.
Rated 14 Aug 2007
80
67th
Good combination of villians.
Rated 05 Feb 2013
80
50th
Really awesome to see a really cool monster movie for one, and with so much variety. The character are sooo awesome. Dracula in this one is probably one of the best portrayals. I think it only really loses points for the pointy ears of the werewolves. Does definitely feel like it was made from the same guys as the mummy.
Rated 16 Aug 2015
100
91st
Van Helsing is wonderful movie - maybe I was in a better mood. Maybe because a lot in Van Helsing is unintentionally funny (like the over-the-top Romanian accents of Dracula's harpies, er, wives who reminded me of the one in Clash of the Titans). Or maybe it was Richard Roxburgh's overacting as Dracula as well. I don't know. At least Van Helsing has one good action set piece (involving a coach chase).

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