Search found 1 match: Chris Tucker

Searched query: chris tucker

by TheDenizen
Mon Oct 29, 2012 3:27 am
Forum: General Discussion
Topic: Favorite Mini-Reviews
Replies: 244
Views: 245146

Re: Favorite Mini-Reviews

http://www.criticker.com/profile/spleen is my latest fave. A sampling:

Iceman (1984) -
"Think of it as "The Thing" meets "ET" meets "Quest For Fire". Meanwhile I'll be over here going through your stuff."

Taken 2 (2012) -
"Philosophical question: Bryan Mills and John McClane are on a plane. Which franchise wins? Answer: whoever punches Famke Janssen in the face first."

Electrocuting an Elephant (1903) -
"Honestly, haven't seen it but I have tickets on reserve for the sequel "Anal Raping Thomas Edison"."

The Fifth Element (1997) -
"If Michael Bay made this, it would've cost 2 billion dollars, had more shots of Milla Jovavich (working on cars, tossing hair, running, etc all in slow motion), Bruce Willis would wear a thong for comedic value and Chris Tucker would've been a robot. Thank you, Luc Besson. Thank you."

Predator (1987) -
"So macho the dvd case had a five o'clock shadow and smelled of cigars."

The Sweetest Thing (2002) -
"If I were stuck on a deserted island with nothing but this movie, a dvd player and a tv, I'd bludgeon myself unconscious with the case to keep from watching it again."

Well done, sir.