Ranking the Bond films

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ShogunRua
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Re: Ranking the Bond films

Post by ShogunRua »

Didn't expect you to like Goldeneye quite that much, but I'm probably more shocked by you ranking Michelle Yeoh 16th instead of 19th by a country mile. By no means is she ugly, but an average-looking, 36 year-old Chinese actress ranks dead last among the Bond girls you've seen so far. No way is she better than Barbara Bach in The Spy Who Loved Me.

Pickpocket
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Re: Ranking the Bond films

Post by Pickpocket »

1. Goldfinger
2. Goldeneye
3. From Russia With Love
4. A View to a Kill
5. Live and Let Die
6. Thunderball
7. Never Say Never Again
8. For Your Eyes Only
9. Dr. No
10. You Only Live Twice
11. The Man With the Golden Gun
12. Moonraker
13. Tomorrow Never Dies
14. Octopussy
15. On Her Majesty's Secret Service
16. Diamonds are Forever
17. The Spy Who Loved Me
18. The Living Daylights
19. Licence To Kill
20. The World Is Not Enough

Villains:

1. Max Zorin (A View to a Kill)
2. Alec Trevelyan (Goldeneye)
3. Scaramanga (The Man With the Golden Gun)
4. Jaws (The Spy Who Loved Me & Moonraker)
5. OddJob (Goldfinger)
6. Goldfinger (Goldfinger)
7. Stromberg (The Spy Who Loved Me)
8. Largo (Never Say Never Again)
9. Donald "Red" Grant (From Russia With Love)
10. Largo (Thunderball)
11. Dr. No (Dr. No)
12. Franz Sanchez (Licence To Kill)
13. Kristatos (For Your Eyes Only)
14. Blofeld (You Only Live Twice)
15. Hugo Drax (Moonraker)
16. Elliot Carver (Tomorrow Never Dies)
17. Kamal (Octopussy)
18. Blofeld (Diamonds are Forever)
19. Kananga (Live and Let Die)
20. Blofeld (On Her Majesty's Secret Service)
21. Renard (The World is Not Enough)
22. Koskov/Whitaker (The Living Daylights)

Girls:

1. Honey Ryder (Ursula Andress in Dr. No)
2. Tiffany Case (Jill St. John in Diamonds are Forever)
3. Natalya Simonova (Izabella Scorupco in Goldeneye)
4. Goodnight (Britt Ekland in The Man with the Golden Gun)
5. Domino (Claudine Auger in Thunderball)
6. Pam Bouvier (Carey Lowell in Licence To Kill)
7. Stacey Sutton (Tanya Roberts in A View to a Kill)
8. Christmas Jones (Denise Richards in The World is Not Enough)
9. Domino (Kim Basinger in Never Say Never Again)
10. Tatiana Romanova (Daniela Bianchi in From Russia With Love)
11. Solitare (Jane Seymour in Live and Let Die)
12. Pussy Galore (Honor Blackman in Goldfinger)
13. Kissy (Mie Hama in You Only Live Twice)
14. Octopussy (Maud Adams in Octopussy)
15. Melina Havelock (Carole Bouquet in For Your Eyes Only)
16. Holly Goodhead (Lois Chiles in Moonraker)
17. Wai Lin (Michelle Yeoh in Tomorrow Never Dies)
18. Agent XXX (Barbara Bach in The Spy Who Loved Me)
19. Kara Milovy (Maryam d'Abo in The Living Daylights)
20. Tracy (Diana Rigg in On Her Majesty's Secret Service)

ShogunRua wrote:Didn't expect you to like Goldeneye quite that much, but I'm probably more shocked by you ranking Michelle Yeoh 16th instead of 19th by a country mile. By no means is she ugly, but an average-looking, 36 year-old Chinese actress ranks dead last among the Bond girls you've seen so far. No way is she better than Barbara Bach in The Spy Who Loved Me.

Barbara Bach is a butterface. Her face creeped me out

Pickpocket
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Re: Ranking the Bond films

Post by Pickpocket »

Die Another Day was not only shitty for a Bond film but just shitty for a movie in general. The direction didn't make sense, the writing was lazy and all of the actors completely mailed it in. An example of poor direction is when Bond is going to this plastic surgery place (at least I think that's what it was) and he's walking through this hallway and they shoot him from a lower angle suggesting dominance and yet the music playing suggests that he's walking into danger. The entire movie is filled with contradictions like this. There's also several instances of them referencing past Bond films but they aren't done out of love but more like "hey, we saw these too." In the climax, they are on this plane trying to stop basically another version of Goldeneye, but this time it's called Icarus or some shit like that, and Halle Berry decides to just drive the airplane into the laser for some reason and of course because this movie makes no sense it keeps flying. She then gets into a sword fight with Rosamund Pike, who earlier in the film we learned was a gold medal winner at the Olympics for fencing. So what happens? Of course the character who has shown a propensity for making poor decisions, being incompetent and being one of the most useless characters ever committed to film wins the sword fight against a gold medal winning fencer. After 21 of these movies, no character has pissed me off as much as Halle Berry's Jinx. She literally makes a yo mama joke in this movie. She runs around looking frightened and even tries to emulate Ursula Andress in her opening scene which was honestly the funniest thing she did. The entire villain backstory was confusing and didn't make any sense to me. So the guy falls off a cliff and presumably drowns or gets hit by something falling off this ledge and then he comes back and gets facial reconstruction surgery as a white guy? Wut. I also think his villain lair was just taken straight from Mr. Freeze on the set of Batman & Robin. And then the guys motivations were never clear. All I really got was he wanted to clear a mine field. Really awful movie.

1. Goldfinger
2. Goldeneye
3. From Russia With Love
4. A View to a Kill
5. Live and Let Die
6. Thunderball
7. Never Say Never Again
8. For Your Eyes Only
9. Dr. No
10. You Only Live Twice
11. The Man With the Golden Gun
12. Moonraker
13. Tomorrow Never Dies
14. Octopussy
15. On Her Majesty's Secret Service
16. Diamonds are Forever
17. The Spy Who Loved Me
18. The Living Daylights
19. Licence To Kill
20. The World Is Not Enough
21. Die Another Day

Villains:

1. Max Zorin (A View to a Kill)
2. Alec Trevelyan (Goldeneye)
3. Scaramanga (The Man With the Golden Gun)
4. Jaws (The Spy Who Loved Me & Moonraker)
5. OddJob (Goldfinger)
6. Goldfinger (Goldfinger)
7. Stromberg (The Spy Who Loved Me)
8. Largo (Never Say Never Again)
9. Donald "Red" Grant (From Russia With Love)
10. Largo (Thunderball)
11. Dr. No (Dr. No)
12. Franz Sanchez (Licence To Kill)
13. Kristatos (For Your Eyes Only)
14. Blofeld (You Only Live Twice)
15. Hugo Drax (Moonraker)
16. Elliot Carver (Tomorrow Never Dies)
17. Kamal (Octopussy)
18. Blofeld (Diamonds are Forever)
19. Kananga (Live and Let Die)
20. Blofeld (On Her Majesty's Secret Service)
21. Renard (The World is Not Enough)
22. Koskov/Whitaker (The Living Daylights)
23. Gustav Graves (Die Another Day)

Girls:

1. Honey Ryder (Ursula Andress in Dr. No)
2. Tiffany Case (Jill St. John in Diamonds are Forever)
3. Natalya Simonova (Izabella Scorupco in Goldeneye)
4. Goodnight (Britt Ekland in The Man with the Golden Gun)
5. Domino (Claudine Auger in Thunderball)
6. Pam Bouvier (Carey Lowell in Licence To Kill)
7. Stacey Sutton (Tanya Roberts in A View to a Kill)
8. Christmas Jones (Denise Richards in The World is Not Enough)
9. Domino (Kim Basinger in Never Say Never Again)
10. Tatiana Romanova (Daniela Bianchi in From Russia With Love)
11. Solitare (Jane Seymour in Live and Let Die)
12. Pussy Galore (Honor Blackman in Goldfinger)
13. Kissy (Mie Hama in You Only Live Twice)
14. Octopussy (Maud Adams in Octopussy)
15. Melina Havelock (Carole Bouquet in For Your Eyes Only)
16. Holly Goodhead (Lois Chiles in Moonraker)
17. Wai Lin (Michelle Yeoh in Tomorrow Never Dies)
18. Agent XXX (Barbara Bach in The Spy Who Loved Me)
19. Kara Milovy (Maryam d'Abo in The Living Daylights)
20. Tracy (Diana Rigg in On Her Majesty's Secret Service)
21. Jinx Johnson (Halle Berry in Die Another Day)

Pickpocket
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Re: Ranking the Bond films

Post by Pickpocket »

1. Goldfinger
2. Goldeneye
3. From Russia With Love
4. A View to a Kill
5. Live and Let Die
6. Thunderball
7. Never Say Never Again
8. For Your Eyes Only
9. Dr. No
10. You Only Live Twice
11. The Man With the Golden Gun
12. Moonraker
13. Tomorrow Never Dies
14. Octopussy
15. On Her Majesty's Secret Service
16. Diamonds are Forever
17. The Spy Who Loved Me
18. The Living Daylights
19. Casino Royale
20. Licence To Kill
21. The World Is Not Enough
22. Die Another Day

Villains:

1. Max Zorin (A View to a Kill)
2. Alec Trevelyan (Goldeneye)
3. Scaramanga (The Man With the Golden Gun)
4. Jaws (The Spy Who Loved Me & Moonraker)
5. OddJob (Goldfinger)
6. Goldfinger (Goldfinger)
7. Stromberg (The Spy Who Loved Me)
8. Largo (Never Say Never Again)
9. Donald "Red" Grant (From Russia With Love)
10. Largo (Thunderball)
11. Dr. No (Dr. No)
12. Franz Sanchez (Licence To Kill)
13. Kristatos (For Your Eyes Only)
14. Blofeld (You Only Live Twice)
15. Hugo Drax (Moonraker)
16. Elliot Carver (Tomorrow Never Dies)
17. Kamal (Octopussy)
18. Blofeld (Diamonds are Forever)
19. Kananga (Live and Let Die)
20. Blofeld (On Her Majesty's Secret Service)
21. Le Chiffre (Casino Royale)
22. Renard (The World is Not Enough)
23. Koskov/Whitaker (The Living Daylights)
24. Gustav Graves (Die Another Day)

Girls:

1. Honey Ryder (Ursula Andress in Dr. No)
2. Tiffany Case (Jill St. John in Diamonds are Forever)
3. Natalya Simonova (Izabella Scorupco in Goldeneye)
4. Goodnight (Britt Ekland in The Man with the Golden Gun)
5. Domino (Claudine Auger in Thunderball)
6. Pam Bouvier (Carey Lowell in Licence To Kill)
7. Stacey Sutton (Tanya Roberts in A View to a Kill)
8. Christmas Jones (Denise Richards in The World is Not Enough)
9. Domino (Kim Basinger in Never Say Never Again)
10. Tatiana Romanova (Daniela Bianchi in From Russia With Love)
11. Solitare (Jane Seymour in Live and Let Die)
12. Pussy Galore (Honor Blackman in Goldfinger)
13. Kissy (Mie Hama in You Only Live Twice)
14. Octopussy (Maud Adams in Octopussy)
15. Melina Havelock (Carole Bouquet in For Your Eyes Only)
16. Holly Goodhead (Lois Chiles in Moonraker)
17. Vesper Lynd (Eva Green in Casino Royale)
18. Wai Lin (Michelle Yeoh in Tomorrow Never Dies)
19. Agent XXX (Barbara Bach in The Spy Who Loved Me)
20. Kara Milovy (Maryam d'Abo in The Living Daylights)
21. Tracy (Diana Rigg in On Her Majesty's Secret Service)
22. Jinx Johnson (Halle Berry in Die Another Day)

Pickpocket
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Re: Ranking the Bond films

Post by Pickpocket »

1. Goldfinger
2. Goldeneye
3. From Russia With Love
4. A View to a Kill
5. Live and Let Die
6. Thunderball
7. Never Say Never Again
8. For Your Eyes Only
9. Dr. No
10. You Only Live Twice
11. The Man With the Golden Gun
12. Moonraker
13. Tomorrow Never Dies
14. Octopussy
15. On Her Majesty's Secret Service
16. Diamonds are Forever
17. The Spy Who Loved Me
18. Quantum of Solace
19. The Living Daylights
20. Casino Royale
21. Licence To Kill
22. The World Is Not Enough
23. Die Another Day

Villains:

1. Max Zorin (A View to a Kill)
2. Alec Trevelyan (Goldeneye)
3. Scaramanga (The Man With the Golden Gun)
4. Jaws (The Spy Who Loved Me & Moonraker)
5. OddJob (Goldfinger)
6. Goldfinger (Goldfinger)
7. Stromberg (The Spy Who Loved Me)
8. Largo (Never Say Never Again)
9. Donald "Red" Grant (From Russia With Love)
10. Largo (Thunderball)
11. Dr. No (Dr. No)
12. Franz Sanchez (Licence To Kill)
13. Kristatos (For Your Eyes Only)
14. Blofeld (You Only Live Twice)
15. Hugo Drax (Moonraker)
16. Dominic Greene (Quantum of Solace)
17. Elliot Carver (Tomorrow Never Dies)
18. Kamal (Octopussy)
19. Blofeld (Diamonds are Forever)
20. Kananga (Live and Let Die)
21. Blofeld (On Her Majesty's Secret Service)
22. Le Chiffre (Casino Royale)
23. Renard (The World is Not Enough)
24. Koskov/Whitaker (The Living Daylights)
25. Gustav Graves (Die Another Day)

Girls:

1. Honey Ryder (Ursula Andress in Dr. No)
2. Tiffany Case (Jill St. John in Diamonds are Forever)
3. Natalya Simonova (Izabella Scorupco in Goldeneye)
4. Camille (Olga Kurylenko in Quantum of Solace)
5. Goodnight (Britt Ekland in The Man with the Golden Gun)
6. Domino (Claudine Auger in Thunderball)
7. Pam Bouvier (Carey Lowell in Licence To Kill)
8. Stacey Sutton (Tanya Roberts in A View to a Kill)
9. Christmas Jones (Denise Richards in The World is Not Enough)
10. Domino (Kim Basinger in Never Say Never Again)
11. Tatiana Romanova (Daniela Bianchi in From Russia With Love)
12. Solitare (Jane Seymour in Live and Let Die)
13. Pussy Galore (Honor Blackman in Goldfinger)
14. Kissy (Mie Hama in You Only Live Twice)
15. Octopussy (Maud Adams in Octopussy)
16. Melina Havelock (Carole Bouquet in For Your Eyes Only)
17. Holly Goodhead (Lois Chiles in Moonraker)
18. Vesper Lynd (Eva Green in Casino Royale)
19. Wai Lin (Michelle Yeoh in Tomorrow Never Dies)
20. Agent XXX (Barbara Bach in The Spy Who Loved Me)
21. Kara Milovy (Maryam d'Abo in The Living Daylights)
22. Tracy (Diana Rigg in On Her Majesty's Secret Service)
23. Jinx Johnson (Halle Berry in Die Another Day)

djross
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Re: Ranking the Bond films

Post by djross »

x
Last edited by djross on Thu Jul 20, 2023 8:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Pickpocket
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Re: Ranking the Bond films

Post by Pickpocket »

djross wrote:
Pickpocket wrote:Oh good, another "let's post a list" thread :roll:

This thread is 4 years old. Plus, since you just copy/paste other's ideas and thoughts your threads are doubly worthless. I mean, even your extremely witty reply was you just copy/pasting something I wrote. At least for once you credited your source :lol: :lol:

ShogunRua
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Re: Ranking the Bond films

Post by ShogunRua »

Predicting that Skyfall will land somewhere in the bottom half of the rankings, albeit higher than most recent Bonds.

Pickpocket
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Re: Ranking the Bond films

Post by Pickpocket »

Skyfall is the movie people think Casino Royale is.

1. Goldfinger
2. Goldeneye
3. From Russia With Love
4. A View to a Kill
5. Live and Let Die
6. Thunderball
7. Never Say Never Again
8. For Your Eyes Only
9. Skyfall
10. Dr. No
11. You Only Live Twice
12. The Man With the Golden Gun
13. Moonraker
14. Tomorrow Never Dies
15. Octopussy
16. On Her Majesty's Secret Service
17. Diamonds are Forever
18. The Spy Who Loved Me
19. Quantum of Solace
20. The Living Daylights
21. Casino Royale
22. Licence To Kill
23. The World Is Not Enough
24. Die Another Day

Villains:

1. Max Zorin (A View to a Kill)
2. Alec Trevelyan (Goldeneye)
3. Scaramanga (The Man With the Golden Gun)
4. Jaws (The Spy Who Loved Me & Moonraker)
5. OddJob (Goldfinger)
6. Goldfinger (Goldfinger)
7. Stromberg (The Spy Who Loved Me)
8. Silva (Skyfall)
9. Largo (Never Say Never Again)
10. Donald "Red" Grant (From Russia With Love)
11. Largo (Thunderball)
12. Dr. No (Dr. No)
13. Franz Sanchez (Licence To Kill)
14. Kristatos (For Your Eyes Only)
15. Blofeld (You Only Live Twice)
16. Hugo Drax (Moonraker)
17. Dominic Greene (Quantum of Solace)
18. Elliot Carver (Tomorrow Never Dies)
19. Kamal (Octopussy)
20. Blofeld (Diamonds are Forever)
21. Kananga (Live and Let Die)
22. Blofeld (On Her Majesty's Secret Service)
23. Le Chiffre (Casino Royale)
24. Renard (The World is Not Enough)
25. Koskov/Whitaker (The Living Daylights)
26. Gustav Graves (Die Another Day)

Girls:

1. Honey Ryder (Ursula Andress in Dr. No)
2. Tiffany Case (Jill St. John in Diamonds are Forever)
3. Natalya Simonova (Izabella Scorupco in Goldeneye)
4. Camille (Olga Kurylenko in Quantum of Solace)
5. Goodnight (Britt Ekland in The Man with the Golden Gun)
6. Domino (Claudine Auger in Thunderball)
7. Pam Bouvier (Carey Lowell in Licence To Kill)
8. Stacey Sutton (Tanya Roberts in A View to a Kill)
9. Christmas Jones (Denise Richards in The World is Not Enough)
10. Domino (Kim Basinger in Never Say Never Again)
11. Tatiana Romanova (Daniela Bianchi in From Russia With Love)
12. Severine (Bérénice Marlohe in Skyfall)
13. Solitare (Jane Seymour in Live and Let Die)
14. Pussy Galore (Honor Blackman in Goldfinger)
15. Kissy (Mie Hama in You Only Live Twice)
16. Octopussy (Maud Adams in Octopussy)
17. Melina Havelock (Carole Bouquet in For Your Eyes Only)
18. Holly Goodhead (Lois Chiles in Moonraker)
19. Vesper Lynd (Eva Green in Casino Royale)
20. Wai Lin (Michelle Yeoh in Tomorrow Never Dies)
21. Agent XXX (Barbara Bach in The Spy Who Loved Me)
22. Kara Milovy (Maryam d'Abo in The Living Daylights)
23. Tracy (Diana Rigg in On Her Majesty's Secret Service)
24. Jinx Johnson (Halle Berry in Die Another Day)

ShogunRua
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Re: Ranking the Bond films

Post by ShogunRua »

I wouldn't even say there is a "Bond girl" in Skyfall. As for Javier Bardem, he did his best to turn chicken shit into chicken salad. He mostly succeeded. The character of Silva, as written in the script, is one of the dumbest, lamest, and most nonsensical villains in any Bond movie, Gustav Graves and Renard included. Bardem's performance largely masked that, in much the same way the movie's gorgeous cinemaphotography masked a shit story, horrible choreography, lack of ideas, etc.

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