Welcome to Criticker: Home of insanely accurate recommendations!

The narrator (Jean-Louis), a devout Catholic, moves to a provincial town and vows to marry Francoise... (imdb)

An ambitious and near insanely violent gangster climbs the ladder of success in the mob, but his weaknesses prove to be his downfall. (imdb)

A French woman mourning over the death of her husband three years prior is courted by a Swedish co-worker. (imdb)

In this prequel to Ring, a young Sadako becomes an actress in hopes of escaping her troubled past. But strange visions and terrifying powers begin to manifest... (imdb)

Get on the Bus follows several Black men on a cross country bus trip to the Million Man March. (imdb)

A guy's life is turned around by an email, which includes the names of everyone he's had sex with and ever will have sex with. His situation gets worse when he encounters a femme fatale (Ryder) who targets men guilty of sex crime. (imdb)

Water hose gag.

A meditation on love and its various incarnations, set within a community of friends in Oregon. and is described as an exploration of the magical, mysterious and sometimes painful incarnations of love. (imdb)

A Danish family visits a Dutch family they met on a holiday. What was supposed to be an idyllic weekend slowly starts unraveling as the Danes try to stay polite in the face of unpleasantness.

Combining the martial arts prowess of international action superstar Jackie Chan with state-of-the-art special effects, this action comedy stars Chan as Eddie Yang, a resolute Hong Kong cop who suffers a near fatal accident while investigating a case involving a mysterious medallion. (Sony Pictures)