Welcome to Criticker: Home of insanely accurate recommendations!

Be ready to learn your ABC's again with 26 new directors and 26 new deaths bring your kids to a blood and gore filled horror so good your face will be blood red. (imdb)

This film focuses on a Burmese refugee whose fate has linked him to the lives of two Thai women in a border town. (Kick the Machine)

A shooting at an all night diner is investigated by three LA policemen in their own unique ways. (imdb)

Harry and Jake, two unsuccessful writers, spend a cathartic evening arguing about money, aesthetics, their friendship, and Harry's new manuscript. (imdb)

Servais Mont, a photographer, meets Nadine Chevalier who earns her money starring in cheap soft-core movies. Trying to help her, he borrows the money from the loan sharks to finance the theatrical production of 'Richard III' and gives Nadine a part. Nadine is torn apart between Servais, for whom she is falling in love, and her husband Jacques, to whom she has moral obligations. (imdb)

In 19th century India, three British soldiers and a native waterbearer must stop a secret mass revival of the murderous Thuggee cult before it can rampage across the land. (imdb)

This sequel to the hit 2000 supernatural thriller finds Clear Rivers (Larter), the only survivor of the crash of Flight 180 left alive, Locked away by her own choice in the perceived safety of a psychiatric hospital. Clear now lives in constant terror that Death is coming to claim her, as it did all her friends. (New Line Cinema)

Wallace falls for Wendolene, a wool shop owner, while Gromit is framed for the sheep rustling. (imdb)

Ed the chimpanzee is more than just a mascot for the Santa Rosa Rockets -- he's actually talented enough to play third base. But when the team starts winning, Ed is kidnapped. Ed's fans and teammates are dismayed, but most devastated of all is Ed's "roommate," a pitcher (Matt LeBlanc) who gets cold feet when he plays but is learning to overcome it with the chimp's help. Will they ever get Ed back? (RottenTomatoes)

The residents of a suburban high-rise apartment building are being infected by a strain of parasites which turn them into mindless, sex-crazed, fiends out to infect others by the slightest sexual contact. (imdb)