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0 film ratings
Kuroel

Celluloid Junkie - 2539 Film Ratings

Member Since: Oct 29, 2012

Location: Finland

Bio: "Dusting is a good example of the futility of trying to put things right. As soon as you dust, the fact of your next dusting has already been established." - George Carlin
more Recent Ratings
65 67% Dave Chappelle: The Closer (2021) - Oct 11, 2021
"It ain't much, but it's honest work. Not the funniest or most insightful but Chappell encapsulates wonderfully what stand-up is all about. Addressing the social elephants in the room with childlike candidness. Bluntness does not equal cruelty and people who take his comedy to heart should reflect what it says about them, not Chappelle. As long as there exists a "punch down" mentality, it only upholds segregationist double standards. That shit deserves to be called out."
45 17% Vivo (2021) - Oct 10, 2021
""Love's Gonna Pick You Up" was bop, ngl. Other than that, I have nothing to comment. As I write this review, the movie (which I watched less than two hours ago) is sinking into obsolescence in the graveyard of my memories. I honestly can't even remember the names of the characters. The blandness was that bad. My kid tapped out two thirds into the movie. Also, 13 minutes of ending credits on a 1,5 hr movie - the hell? That is longer than in The Return of the King ffs."
59 46% The Last of the Mohicans (1992) - Oct 10, 2021
"Girl. You knew DDL for two days and snogged with him once. You are not in love with him. I also don't get the hype about the cinematography. National Geographic has done way better. A large chunk of the movie also happens inside a fortress that is lit by, I presume, a single lighter. You can't see shit. But I do admit that DDL's thirsty and lingering stare was potent. I get why Stowe wanted to snog. But blue balls don't equal love, still."
70 79% School Rumble (2004) - Oct 07, 2021
63 61% Samurai Champloo (2004) - Oct 07, 2021
72 83% The Story of Saiunkoku (2006) - Oct 07, 2021
44 15% Saint Seiya (1986) - Oct 07, 2021
20 2% Grosse Pointe Blank (1997) - Oct 05, 2021
"Am I high or why is everyone rating this like it's hangover pizza? It's a loosely stringed array of scenes from fifteen different movie genres. It's a romance, thriller, dramedy, conspiracy spy parody, mental health drama, action, buddy comedy, farce, reunion movie and it ends up being an unrecognisable amalgam of everything and nothing. Tonal shifts are as jarring as disco strobes on LSD. Not charming, thrilling, intriguing or funny."
63 61% Samurai X (1996) - Oct 05, 2021
59 46% Rozen Maiden (2004) - Oct 05, 2021