Celluloid Junkie - 2603 Film Ratings
Member Since: Jan 24, 2012
Location: Your neighborhood, right behind you. , USA
Bio: I'm going to fudge my rankings and uprank movies that are my actual favorites. My favorite movies are rarely the best in craft. And while one of my favorites may be the expertly crafted The Godfather, I'm not going to be using this unique opportunity to recommend you something you already know you should see. If you were waiting for me personally to convince you to watch Seven Samurai, you have put too much pressure on a guy that likes Michael Dudikoff films. I had previously given Ravenous an 86 when in reality it's a 75 tops. Now it's a 100. Welcome to my recommendations.
Check out Paxton's...
|70 60%||Scare Package (2019) - Jul 01, 2020
"Hinges on becoming superfluous, but is entertaining enough throughout in large part thanks to the wrap around stories actors. Everything in the video store is a good time. More anthologies should embrace their ridiculousness without needing to go full Chillerama. "
|67 47%||Ninja Zombie (1992) - Jun 29, 2020
"Orlan is a terrible lead so it's good he plays second fiddle to a ninja zombie, who is much more a zombie ninja in my opinion. The villain is fairly menacing at the beginning before he turns into Jim Carrey lite and seems more wacky than wacked out. There's a couple of laugh out loud moments where gore or acting go overboard. Worth your time if you like DIY filmmaking on a budget and can sacrifice squandered potential for cheap laughs."
|67 47%||Centipede Horror (1984) - Jun 29, 2020
"You wait an inordinate amount of time for something spectacular to happen and once it does you wish you were blind."
|69 54%||Get Smart (2008) - Jun 26, 2020
"This was a surprisingly entertaining update of a show that was almost entirely comprised of shoe phones."
|74 72%||Troll Hunter (2010) - Jun 26, 2020
"Troll Hunter succeeds where Dog the Bounty Hunter failed. Okay, it's not that perfect, but it's very entertaining."
|51 20%||9½ Weeks (1986) - Jun 25, 2020
"I can't remember, is the water in that one scene coming from the rain or from a sewer pipe? Cause it looks like a sewer pipe. This movie was too kinky."
|65 43%||Reality Bites (1994) - Jun 25, 2020
"I remember when I used to think this would be the worst generation ever. Oh nostalgia!"
|40 9%||Dance with Death (1992) - Jun 24, 2020
"A young and brunette(!) Lisa Kudrow plays best friend in a minor role while Rex Manning himself plays the lover in a major part. Our actual hero is a reporter turned stripper and they do not skimp on the strip scenes. There are roughly forty of them. Throw in Martin Mull as the club owner and the cast is just as stacked as...well, you get it."
|20 1%||Invisible Mom (1997) - Jun 24, 2020
"Mom drinks some bad RC Cola her son doctored with one of his wormy father's many many beakers and goes invisible. From this point on she either completely covers every inch of her body with clothes/mask/gloves/bonnet or evidently walks around completely nude. Eventually they make her eat dog food as an attempted fix. There are several attempts to undo Invisible Mom's invisibility by both her husband and child while she is standing directly in front of them stark naked. An odd film."
|45 13%||Vegas Vacation (1997) - Jun 23, 2020
"Wayne Newton steals the show with an incredible turn as a poorly tanned, badly dyed, bloated, past his prime, fake plastic looking casino cadaver (I mean crooner) with a hard-on for mature married women. Waaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiittttt a minute!"