Film Freak - 546 Rankings
Member Since: Mar 21, 2010
Location: Copenhagen, Copenhagen, Denmark
|74 T8||Like Father, Like Son (2013) - Nov 30, 2017|
|45 T4||XOXO (2016) - Nov 27, 2017
"This movie really XOXOcks. Or, well, I dunno. It took me almost a month to watch it since I could only stand watching it in 10-minute bites, but I think watching it like that actually made me a thousand times more tolerant of the awful music and ridiculously dumb characters. The two main characters look super likable but the guy's talent as a performer is pressing a button and pantomiming a dance, and the girl's so slow that she had an emotional connection to a bland techno song, so yeah."
|22 T2||Security (2017) - Nov 13, 2017
"It took me a while to come across a really terrible one, but this is it: the worst film I've seen all year. Banderas is trash--mumblemouthed and sleepwalking through a humorless role that clashes with the cartoonish crew he leads. Kingsley's unwilling expression as he talks about huffing & puffing almost salvages his part, but not quite. The kid's part was poorly written and, err, barely acted. The constant barrage of melodramatic strings and the dull cinematography didn't help matters. "
|62 T6||Dragonlance: Dragons of Autumn Twilight (2008) - Nov 09, 2017
"Hahaha, the PSI was at 4. That has to be the biggest swing and a miss to date. I totally get why almost no one liked this--I was stunned to learn this was from less than 10 years ago; it legitimately looks 20 years older than it is, and it still would've been sloppy-looking back then--but for me, this was a totally enjoyable nostalgia ride. Campy as hell, crams way too much into 90 minutes, and Kiefer gives even less of an effort as Raistlin than he did as Snake... yet it all adds to the charm."
|47 T4||Assault on Precinct 13 (2005) - Nov 07, 2017
"Though I was down enough for the ride to stay engaged the whole way through, it didn't have a lot going for it other than constant bursts of action. I didn't realize it was based on a book or that it was a remake 30 years in the making, but good lord, I don't think I've ever seen a more insultingly obvious plot twist. It's hinted at half a dozen times in super obvious, hamfisted fashion. The final shot (which is bad) is held for so long that it seems like a glitch. I dunno why I enjoyed this..."
|32 T2||The Replacements (2000) - Nov 05, 2017
"Riddled with cliches and stereotypes, but passable popcorn flick for the first hour or so. Then I realized it's overlong, sorta impenetrable for non-Americans for whom American rugby is little but a concussion free-for-all, and that as far as miscast leads go, Reeves isn't even interesting since he hardly puts in any effort at all. Him and his love interest felt like they belonged in a different film; Hackman also felt sorta detached, but he was the best, most earnest part of The Replacements."
|62 T6||Strange Magic (2015) - Nov 04, 2017
"It feels fragmented and oddly paced, goes into 'welp, gotta wrap it up' mode with zero elegance (the resolution to the subplot with the tiny elf dude and the princess' sister being the most blatant example I've ever seen), and the music aspect of the film is completely undercooked. Yet I found it all quite charming. I don't know the first thing about animation, but I thought the costumes were very neat, and the monsters were appalling li'l cutiepies. Couple of laughs, plenty of smiles."
|38 T3||The Bad Education Movie (2015) - Nov 02, 2017
"I think dumb comedies give me Stockholm syndrome--somehow I kinda like them near the end. Young(er) Michael Caine was a neat character, and the pay-off to the tattoo bit both made me laugh and took the film in a completely new direction, so kudos for that. Tons of misses, but a bit of funny in a inappropriately nice(ly shot) setting. Apropos nothing, I literally never heard "in loco parentis" before hearing Bruce Dickinson said it yesterday, so for that to be a punchline(?) here was really odd."
|61 T6||Lionheart (1990) - Nov 01, 2017
"PSI predicted a 14, but I had a good time--probably would've been closer to 70 if it wasn't for the rough start and the silly ending. The Lionheart universe is basically the Yakuza overworld, what with nonsense skirmishes breaking out when you approach a pay phone, swimming pool brawls, improbably huge and lucrative underground fight rings, and people being pretty lax about you showing up half dead. The music, characters, fights, and presentation made it way more fun to watch than Bloodsport."
|88 T10||Prisoners (2013) - Oct 31, 2017
"Great, great movie. Believable performances and lotsa keepin' you guessing. I thought I disliked Gyllenhaal but he was Blade Runner-ready in this one. Less overtly flashy shots and cinematography than in his two previous films, but very nice nevertheless; easy to see why Villeneuve got the BR gig. Week-later edit: I totally didn't realize that was Hugh Jackman. Genuinely thought it was a Hugh Jackman-type actor whose name I didn't know. Huh."