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0 film ratings
chemical404

Celluloid Junkie - 3414 Film Ratings

Member Since: Oct 21, 2008

Bio:
Rating system that I use:
0-10 - Hated these movies.
11-20 - Simply bad.
21-30 - Waste of time.
31-40 - Waste of time, but these films have their moment or two.
41-50 - Mediocre films that I consider to be slightly below average.
51-60 - OK films that I consider to be slightly above average.
61-70 - Decent. Had a good time watching them.
71-80 - Very good movies that I liked and would recommend.
81-90 - Great films with some flaw.
91-100 - Exeptional, life-changing, desert island films.

No short review - very old ratings, that I'm not so sure about any more.
more Recent Ratings
20 5% Olympus Has Fallen (2013) - May 20, 2019
"I believe when Bill Hick's talked about people who suck Satan's cock he meant exactly the type of people who made this movie. No one could convince me that someone would be inspired to make such a patriotic cheese without some interested party throwing as much money as it cost to buy a soul these days. I found yellow terrorist's evil plan brilliantly ironic. Whoever wrote that deserves a clap on the back (when they choke on that juicy Satan's cock.) NSFW "
40 25% The Replacement Killers (1998) - May 20, 2019
"First time rated on December 23rd, 2008. Rewatching this almost 12 years later on my completely unexplainable quest to watch every movie Mr. Fuqua directed. This one is an Americanized (or bastardized) bullet ballet flick. Although it is a very close imitation of John Woo's early work, it is cheesy and somewhat pathetic where same movies made in HK are cool and fun. Beats me. "
63 67% Happy as Lazzaro (2018) - Apr 23, 2019
"Interesting, but somewhat lacking a strong point Italian magic-realist fable. For the first half it's intriguing story about peasants seemingly struck in time who are taken advantage of by landlordess, with a 'God's Kindhearted Simpleton' as a central figure. Around the middle the film undergoes tonal and temporal shift that cought me by surprise. I didn't like that part too much, and while socio-economic commentary is interesting, it never really becomes clear. 16mm pleases at first, not long."
64 69% Everybody Knows (2018) - Apr 13, 2019
"I've been on a long binge of watching old, mediocre at best movies, so maybe that's why I found this movie so pleasant to watch. It's one of the few big artsy films Europe produces every year and it's the first film Farhadi made outside Persia. It's hard to imagine story taking place anywhere else but Spain, as it is so culturally rich. If not for somewhat anticlimactic and uninspired story, the film very solid. "
54 46% Descendant of the Sun (1983) - Mar 25, 2019
"Evil emperor is murdering all stupid-looking babies, so only intelligent people would live in his empire. Everything goes according to this devious plan, until Jesus/Superman steps in, and grandiose battles of supercharged rainbows, colorful explosions and lasers shot from hands ensues. Funny, trippy wuxia pian fantasy, and for once I could follow the plot. As crazy and over-the-top it is, I find it lacking that little something that makes bad movies great."
48 34% 2019 - After the Fall of New York (1983) - Mar 24, 2019
"One of many Italo post-apocalyptic Mad Max rip-offs. There were at least five of them released in '83 alone. I watched it in 2019, and I can confirm that future predictions are wrong. Plot is uninspired Escape from New York and Mad Max 2 pastiche. It has some of that bad movie charm, and you can see there was some actual effort put in making miniatures and costumes. Just not memorable enough."
62 64% Carmen (1983) - Mar 21, 2019
"Not the type of film I would be too eager to watch, but it was a pleasant surprise!It was interesting how life and a piece of art in this movie slowly blend together, and by the end you are lost of what is a dance performance and what is character's life. The story is not that great, methinks. The choreographer guy would be deep in #metoo scandal right now. The dances are actually cool to watch, and only a bit gay."
38 22% Class (1983) - Mar 21, 2019
"Another bizarro rom-roc from early 80's. It's about school boy, who doesn't look a day over 14 hooking up with Bisset, who looks somewhere in the 40s. I mean WHAT?! Not once in the movie the issue of the woman being a pedophile was addressed. Different times I guess. First movie roles for for Rob Lowe, John Cusack and Andrew McCarthy. I'm yet to see a movie with brat pack I would be okay with."
53 44% Streamers (1983) - Mar 19, 2019
"Altman took some unpredictable turns during his long career. Streamers is well acted, had hitting drama, that unfortunately never seems to leave confines of theater behind it. What I think bothered me the most about it, is that it feels like one of those didactic we-went-to-see-it-as-a-school-trip type of plays. On a positive side, it deals with issues like war, homophobia, racism is a completely open way, which I didn't expect to see in a movie of that era."
37 20% The Pirates of Penzance (1983) - Mar 19, 2019
"Watching this I felt dark dread come over me every time Angela Lansbury came on screen, and I wasn't quite sure why that is. Now it's couple of days later, and it suddenly hit me. Around five years ago I saw this video unearthed by Everything is Terrible with Lansbury having a bath (trust me, if you haven't seen it yet, don't). Now at the time I did my best to erase it from my memory, and I didn't remember the fact consciously even watching a movie with her, but subconscious remembers."