Bio: Even though I haven't had time to do anything lately - www.spreaker.com/show/nothingsgood and CoolRunningsMovies.blogspot.com for my weekly podcast, full reviews and other stuff. Not updated in basically a year, but fuck it maybe you'll laugh.
|45 40%||Pet Sematary (1989) - Apr 18, 2019
"Despite some generally creepy moments and a handful of quality performances, Pet Sematary is mired by tonal inconsistencies, trite and cheap editing, and a complete inability to successfully integrate Pascow into the story. Worth a watch if only for Fred Gwynne, the final scene, and the best use of a cat in 80s cinema."
|65 64%||Dumbo (2019) - Apr 13, 2019
"Were it not for the paper thin character motivations and the "acting" of Eva Green, Colin Farrell, and two kids who should never be cast in anything else, Dumbo is actually surprisingly refreshing. Burton's thick expressionist art direction looks really good here if you like that sort of thing, the Dumbo animation feels real, and some of the performances and beats ring triumphant. Unfortunately, it loses steam once Michael Keaton shows up to be the bad guy because movies need bad guys."
|15 7%||Playing Hard (2018) - Apr 13, 2019
"Probably one of the worst documentaries I've ever seen. It shows almost nothing, hiding behind subjects inferring things that happen without ever elaborating or specifying why, how or what. Vandenberghe is the only interesting examination, but he's portrayed to be so deluded and unaware he's hard to feel sympathy for. Cardin is every modern human I want to punch in the face. Watch Indie Game: The Movie instead."
|25 15%||Us (2019) - Apr 10, 2019
"Plodding, irrational and pretentious. Wasn't good for 120 minutes, them the twist made it even worse."
|45 40%||The Stanford Prison Experiment (2015) - Apr 06, 2019
"It's interesting and well made, but the script is a little too focused on trying to recreate the actuality and doesn't flesh out a compelling story. Stuff just sort of happens, then it ends."
|35 27%||Captain Marvel (2019) - Mar 21, 2019
"I'm not sure what's more of a mar-vell, the can't-see-it-coming flashback driven storytelling, the edge-of-your-cockpit excitement, the vintage MCU humor, or all the shoehorned female empowerment nonsense that's as organic as it is well executed. I was sufficiently moved by the appropriation of Skrull culture into Honduran refugees. What a time to be alive."
|65 64%||Fighting with My Family (2019) - Mar 20, 2019
"It's a pretty by-the-numbers rags-to-riches story athletic story, but has enough structure and quality moments to register as worthwhile. What they do with Zak's character is actually the glue of the movie, not so much Paige. Like with every Hollwyood portrayal of sports though, incredibly unrealistic to the real thing, and regarding the true story it's basically as true as fake news."
|65 64%||Sorry to Bother You (2018) - Mar 03, 2019
"Come for the coke, stay for the horse cock."
|5 3%||The Killing of a Sacred Deer (2017) - Mar 01, 2019
"A24: a film student's wet dream. Literally nothing happens for the first 65 minutes. File under U for unwatchable. 5 points for Nicole Kidman's tit and Colin Farrell's secret."
|60 55%||The Lego Movie 2: The Second Part (2019) - Feb 27, 2019
"Did Chris Miller and Phil Lord actually write this, because it certainly doesn't feel like. The real world parallel in "The Second Part" is infinitely forced and adds only tedium and annoyance. Lacks the wonderment, humor or originality of its prequel, replacing it only with Maya Rudolph, Tiffany Haddish and four musical numbers."