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0 film ratings

Celluloid Junkie - 2815 Film Ratings

Member Since: Jul 26, 2008

Location: Canada

Age: 36

Bio: I have a twitter: https://twitter.com/flickmetictyler
I have a website too: https://flickmetic.com

If you want more of my movie opinions, pictures of a bunny AND some data analysis regarding movies (along with some other off-topic stuff occasionally), please check it out.

Don't worry, I will always post my reviews on Criticker too because I love this site more than my own family (don't tell them) and this has been an incredibly valuable resource/tool for me. Plus I appreciate all of you people who have ever reached out to me or starred my reviews. I can't quit you, Criticker, I just want to make some money at my website and hopefully someday quit my crap job.

Anything 51 and up is a recommendation, meaning you aren't wasting your time seeing it. Anything between 51-79 ranges from mediocre to very good. Anything 80+ is what I call a "Great Movie" and it's a must-see and is awesome to various degrees. Anything that's a 50 is something that I'm a fence sitter on (meaning I'm too useless to actually be able to make up my god damn mind) so it could go either way. 49 and under means you should avoid. Under 10 means I was probably raped by the movie or, at the very least, fondled. Despite the effort I've put into explaining my rating system, numbers are fairly often chosen at random (well, maybe my gut feeling) so I might actually like a movie I rated 75 more than an 85, I just really can't be bothered to go back and constantly re-do my ratings.
more Recent Ratings
65 28% Venom: Let There Be Carnage (2021) - Oct 15, 2021
"Some really funny jokes and good action sequences, improving upon the first. I like Hardy a lot even if these films don't use him as well as they should, and I enjoy this version of Venom, but the film as a whole--just like the first--feels like some of the early MCU movies. Entertaining, never boring, but kind of a mess with no real depth. Plot is all over the place and the writer put no effort into explaining anything. On the plus side though, it's breezy. Definition of a popcorn flick I guess"
55 17% Halloween Kills (2021) - Oct 15, 2021
"I ultimately like it because Myers is still cool and how he's handled was fun, the music is still GOAT status, and the concept of an entire town embracing mob mentality due to the corrupting power of fear. There are some great moments. The problem is, this is lesser than the last one, which was just a lesser version of the original, so we're trending downward. Much of it is just plain silly, even by horror movie standards. Felt insubstantial when it wasn't functioning well, which was common."
40 9% Cry Macho (2021) - Oct 04, 2021
"My main problem is that like Eastwood trying to walk up a knoll, the pacing is glacial. I like him, as always, and I like seeing him as a good but "fed up with this shit" old man, but it's just not that entertaining. That would be acceptable if it didn't shoehorn "tense" moments that come and go quickly, or if the interactions with the boy were worth investing in. It's a tender movie with some potent moments, but they are too few and far between to recommend this. Directing is sold though."
70 39% Best Sellers (2021) - Sep 22, 2021
"I'm a writer so the premise appeals to me, but I never expected it to be an amazing movie. It was about what I expected: a solid drama with two good actors putting in good work. Sappy at the end but hell, it felt earned. I also just have a thing for these movies where old people remember/lament their lives. I don't care how many times an old person says that their wife/husband was everything to them, it still gets me."
80 65% Near Dark (1987) - Sep 20, 2021
"There is some awful dialogue and moments where the acting devolves into being a little too over the top. But it's also fun and dark, never boring, and even though I shat on the acting sometimes, most of the time it's endearing. The kinds of characters that are so extreme that it's hard to take your eyes off of them, especially in the bar scene."
80 65% The Green Knight (2021) - Sep 19, 2021
"Like many A24 produced films that I've seen, it's a gorgeous, wonderfully directed film. Lowery deserves a lot of props here, and I really dug the ominous soundtrack. Unfortunately, it does meander some. I respect how it doesn't give a shit about explaining anything, but there are times where I had a hard time investing beyond appreciating the atmosphere. That's because the characters are just kind of there. But the artistic vision is enough for me to consider this great, ultimately."
40 9% Yakuza Princess (2021) - Sep 17, 2021
"Stiff story-wise, honestly. There are fun parts here and there and I thought it got off to a good start. Really, Takeshi is the only character worth a damn and his interactions with other Yakuza are the highlight. But this blah blah about the Muramasa and all the other stuff is drab, uninspired. The film is relatively stylish but it didn't work for me because it got in the way of everything. "
75 52% Prisoners of the Ghostland (2021) - Sep 16, 2021
"A little disappointed but it's still a fun genre flick. There is some really inspired imagery and Cage is clearly having a lot of fun here. It was weird but that weirdness didn't always translate to a compelling narrative. It was a little difficult to get invested sometimes. I give it some points for the excellent action sequence in the final act, along with the dual ball kicks which actually made me laugh out loud. "
85 80% The Guilty (2021) - Sep 14, 2021
"Having seen and loved the original, this suffers a bit. Gyllenhaal was wonderful, but then, so was Cedergren in the original. So really this doesn't have anything that the original doesn't have, and has diminishing returns. Script is great but not quite as polished as the original. With that said, still a fucking tense thriller. I forgot how absolutely devastating the big reveal near the end is, so it sucked living through that again. This was never boring."
60 22% Summertime (2021) - Sep 12, 2021
"Frustrating movie. Appreciate the intention more than execution. Showcases poetry/artists. Movie occasionally introduces a character and then follows them, flowing seamlessly like good poetry does, from idea to idea, person to person, etc. Slice of life film that mostly lacks good characters, making them--in the form of abrupt slam poetry--hammer home their ideas, mistaking that for character development while disrupting the flow. Plus, honestly, outside of certain contexts, that shit is cheesy."