All About Eve

Of all the remaining movies on my Best Picture watch list at this time (16 to go as of this writing), All About Eve was one I was anticipating the most. I love me a classic-era psychological thriller, and the set-up was so simple (a dewy-eyed young woman ingratiates herself into a friend group on Broadway and tears it apart as she schemes to get what she wants), it would have to work real hard not to come together. It's a legendary movie. It's where the "fasten your seat belts, it's going to be a bumpy ride" line comes from. And yet, the movie defied expectations. It did the hard work I didn't want it to do. It didn't come together. It's not from any one thing, but a bunch of little things. I should stress that this is one of those movies where I recognize it's a me thing ... but my wife watched this with me, and she wasn't impressed either. "Maybe it worked back then", she said, and while I want to believe that's true, there's plenty of examples of movies of this ilk, from that time, that work far better. Gaslight and Shadow Of A Doubt come to mind. Part of it is that either Eve is too obvious an antagonist, or the rest of the cast is positioned as too dumb. The red flags are unmistakable from the get-go, and everybody's too struck by how star-struck and demure she is to pay attention. I didn't believe it for a second. That's not to say the cast doesn't do a good job with what they're given; every actor here is fantastic. But their characters all have to be bone stupid for the plot to work. It isn't until the closing 20 minutes or so when everything unravels, because one person suspects something is wrong when Eve overplays her hand and starts pulling threads, at which point her scheme unravels with astonishing speed. Except it doesn't, because the person who figures it out ... keeps it quiet so he can possess and control her? So Eve gets what she wants with no repercussions? And in the end, nobody gets hurt? Everybody's fine, there's no escalation, no nothing. Just ... Eve wins, but bloodlessly, and the main cast go on with their lives, happy and healthy and unharmed. What was all this for, then? It's like watching a basketball player get the fast break, trips at the top of the key, but the ball bounces off the ground and goes into the hoop anyway. No, worse, because sports still requires a winner and loser. EVERYBODY wins in All About Eve. No marriages are ruined, no careers are destroyed, and nobody dies. There are no lasting consequences. Think about all the iconic villains in movies, and how even if/when they failed, they still left indelible marks on the world around them. Once Eve Harrington gets what she wants, she goes to Hollywood. The people she manipulated are no worse for having known her; in fact, they're better off, one of the couples is brought even closer together than before. The whole movie, Eve's machinations never feel as dire as they should be, and the ending underscores this. Everybody's fine, everybody moves on. Well, if all's well that ends well, why should I care? It's like the old argument about how if Indiana Jones just stayed out of it, the events of both Raiders and Last Crusade would've unfolded positively anyway. But those at least had a thrilling ride, and Indiana Jones was our vessel through which we got to see the events unfold, regardless of his agency. All About Eve's journey never feels dangerous, she never feels like a serious threat, so I can't even care about the journey, let alone the destination. Again, I say all this admitting that maybe it's me. Maybe I had too high of expectations. The acting was outstanding, with Bette Davis and Anne Baxter the obvious standouts. The way Eve ever so subtly manipulates everyone around her is clever without getting convoluted. I just couldn't stop but wonder when the movie was going to kick into a higher gear, and when it didn't, when it showed Eve left virtually no negative impact on the world around her, I couldn't help but be let down. What should've been a high tension game of cat-and-mouse until the stakes became life and death was just a story of standard-issue entertainment industry backbiting. It wasn't a bumpy ride, it was a kid in the seat behind me kicking it. The kid got in trouble and I still got where I was going, unchanged and unbothered.