Climax

I watched this on the same night as another weird movie, The Lighthouse. I came into that movie with low expectations after a previous disappointing experience with the director's other work and I came away thoroughly impressed. For Climax, I came in with strong expectations; I'd read a review elsewhere and thought it sounded very interesting. A movie where, other than the beginning and ending, everything is improvised? A 42-minute unbroken shot? The story being a party that goes terribly awry when the sangria is laced with LSD and nobody knows until its too late? And this is a horror movie? So many checkboxes ticked. Unfortunately, this was the opposite of my experience with The Lighthouse. While I can appreciate the technical aspects of this film from an objective standpoint, what they amount to is little more than some smartest-guy-in-the-room, "I'm An Artiste" BS from a director getting high off his own supply. Climax is a movie that feels like it was created to push buttons and provoke strong feelings, but never actually succeeds in doing so. The warning signs are right there at the beginning, as director Gaspar Noe puts the end credits at the beginning. OOH HOW NON-CONFORMIST. The beginning credits are in the middle, as in literally the midway point, and every name is stylized in a different font. There's a few interstitial cards like a silent movie, but they exist only to barf up some "I ate too many edibles" platitude that adds nothing to the movie. And one of them is UPSIDE DOWN! How counter-culture! Once the movie starts, it doesn't. By that, I mean this movie's actual format is so broken, nothing happens for 45 minutes. The first ten or so are spent with reality TV confessional-style interviews with the cast members, in character, that are all improvised, and it shows. Other than two cast members, the rest -- and we're talking 20 or so other people -- never acted prior to this, and it shows. The interviews are shown as an insert on a TV in an entertainment center, surrounded by stacks of VHS. Titles like Zombie (the Italian movie from the early 80's) and Salo or 120 Days Of Sodom are, I guess, supposed to give the viewer a hint of what's to come? Never mind that the movie absolutely does not deliver on those promises, they're also obscure Easter eggs many people won't even get. Yes, I imagine if you're watching a Gaspar Noe film, you're probably not an average movie goer, but still, the movies listed are not ones with mainstream appeal. Some don't even reach cult status. The references will go over a lot of heads. Anyway, after that, there's like a ten minute dance number -- no, seriously -- where this dance troupe at a retreat has successfully rehearsed this complicated routine. And we get to see the whole thing! What does it add to the story? NOTHING. After that, twenty minutes of cuts back and forth between different pairings of partygoers talking to one another. One guy bragging (perhaps lying) another how he's slept with almost every woman in the troupe, and how he plans on bedding the last few tonight; a brother and sister arguing about his possessiveness over her; two women who might be lovers having an argument; two men talking about having anal sex and the pros and cons of with or without lube, and so on. Other than Mr. I'm Gonna Screw Every Woman and the siblings, almost none of these conversations contribute to the proceedings, and only serve to paint the picture that this party is attended almost exclusively by that one person you never want to be cornered with at a party. But now there's two dozen of them in one room. Outstanding, give me more of this, I beg of you. Everybody drinks the laced sangria, not knowing it's laced, and then the mid-movie beginning credits bisect the movie, literally. From here, the lacing is discovered, and the 42-minute unbroken shot begins, tracing through the facility as people feel the effects, make decisions, and try to determine who it is that spiked the punch. I say that as if there's some grand investigation, but there isn't. There's a couple of rushes to judgment because, you know, paranoia and being on a powerful hallucinogen, but beyond that, it's not much of a plot point. The camera weaves in and out of moments and "sub-plots" get picked up and dropped at random. A pregnant woman who didn't drink is accused of spiking it and harassed into self-mutilation until a friend stops her; this is the last we see of her. But she's also beaten up and may have had a miscarriage? But we don't see her again for another half hour, so who knows. A woman accidentally backs up into a small flame and sets her head on fire, and we don't see her again for a half an hour, because why would that be important. Everybody gets mad at the wannabe Lothario for hitting on someone and beat him and use lipstick to ... draw a swastika on his forehead? There's so many more sub-plots I could mention, but here's the gist of it all; none of them matter. The idea behind the last half of this movie is to make the viewer feel as tripped out as the partygoers and shock the viewer with the content. But it never feels trippy, just exhausting and tedious. Fluttering from one situation to another like a hummingbird doesn't intrigue, it aggravates, since they don't tie into a cohesive narrative by design, and none are given more than a few minutes before we move down the hall. None of them are particularly scary, and since the characters are all miserable, it's impossible to get emotionally invested. And none of it is shocking. Not even a little. The movie promises some hedonistic, Caligula-on-acid whirlwind, and you get a few people having sex, a couple people hurt themselves, and a couple people die due to poor choices made while high. I've seen more shocking events on Mythbusters. I can appreciate the technical aspects of this film. That long unbroken shot is impressive. The dance routine at the beginning, while pointless, is an accomplishment. And I can respect the idea behind this movie. But it is all show and no go, and it is clear it didn't fulfill the idea the director had in mind. It's not sexy, it's not disturbing, it's not provocative, it's not repulsive. It's a film school student who thinks a little too highly of his amazing idea, not realizing that some ideas are better on paper than they are in execution.