The Beyond

So. This is a classic, huh, Shudder? The movie has no concern with starting the plot until almost the halfway mark. Even when it finally does clue you in on the story, the movie has no interest in going at the pace of anything other than a Sunday drive by an old lady with an arthritic foot. Really, the movie is little more than a wraparound for a bunch of stupidly gory set pieces that are too OTT to find scary, but too insulting to find funny. The interesting cinematography is the only thing that is worthwhile in this movie. The acting is awkward, the dialogue unnatural and intolerable, the special effects cheesy and obvious, and the story as engaging as watching someone watch paint drying. Don’t even get me started on the stupid ending. This movie stole 90 minutes of my life; I’m not giving it any more time by being creative with this review. (Hooptober 8.0 review #1 of 23)