The Dark Crystal

In video games, there's something called a "tech demo". These are usually simple programs running on the console's chip set that showcase what the console is capable of. More often than not, these tech demos are a proof of concept, shown at trade shows. A sizzle reel to generate buzz for the processing power of the console. Sometimes, these even get developed into full-blown games. Pilotwings on the Super Nintendo, and Wii Sports and Wii Play on the Wii are great examples of this. I mention this because it's the best way I can describe The Dark Crystal. It is a movie where I can see every drop of blood, sweat, and tears, every ounce of creative energy, and every dollar on the screen. The character and set design is beyond reproach. It is the the most expansive example of the visual creativity of Jim Henson and his team. Unfortunately, that is where the creativity stops, because the script never approaches the creativity of the visuals. The script's contribution to world-building never matches up to the visual aspect, for a couple reasons. The first is how the script somehow manages to dump a ton of lore on the viewer, but never explains much of it either. The key struggle between the two warring races (with a third caught in the crossfire) is over the titular item ... but how it works, or why putting a shard of it back in the main crystal, is never explained. How will putting the crystal back together help the world? Not explained. What happens if the three suns align before it can happen? Not explained. It's like a coloring book that hasn't been colored in; you have the outlines of pictures, but not the detail. There's all this amazing visual detail to the world, but what makes the world work is sketched out in a way that feels both cumbersome and too light to understand. The bigger problem, though, is the protagonist, Jen. He is your standard chosen one protag. I'm not going to complain about that. I mean, John McClane could be considered a chosen one protag. That archetype is everywhere. Where The Dark Crystal fails is in making Jen believable as the protagonist in any way, shape, or form. I don't know if they were going for "wide-eyed, sheltered, and naive" or just plain incompetent, but Jen is absolutely useless at everything, and I do mean everything. Love interest and secondary protagonist Kira saves him or furthers the plot constantly, while Jen is left to reiterate what we can see or what narration told us, stare blankly, and do nothing but be afraid. I wouldn't trust him to get to the end of my driveway without needing Google Maps to get back. I would expect better results if I handed a kindergartner an Ikea cabinet than I would asking Jen to turn on a light switch. He is impossible to root for, because he does nothing, which not only makes him a lousy protagonist, but a ridiculous choice for a chosen-one archetype. Luke Skywalker didn't know The Force from the outset, but he knew how to fly, and he knew how to work on droids. Jen doesn't have a hero's journey, because he never learns anything and never accomplishes anything; someone else always bails him out. This leads to The Dark Crystal feeling like a beautiful house with nothing inside it. The story doesn't so much move as it feels pushed by necessity, dragging along the dead weight of Jen with it. It is lovely to look at, and certainly admirable as a technical achievement. And while younger kids might find it dark, if you see it at the right age, I imagine the cracks won't be visible. But once you hit the teenage years, it's painfully obvious how little there is to this movie besides the design.