JackSour
Celluloid Junkie
Member Since: 30 Jun 2025
Bio: Fear not, for 'tis I, Jack Sour! I critique films then drink for an hour. Daniel's, Bacardi, Walker, cherry; so powerful a concoction, it's a wonder I'm not hairy. I'm foul. I'm horny. I smell of dead fish. I love to talk films; come hither, let's dish!
Featured Reviews
Check out JackSour's...
Hope Floats (1998) - Rated 27 Aug 2025
"The pacing ... ugh"
Grumpy Old Men (1993) - Rated 27 Aug 2025
"Bad editing, but I still laughed a lot."
Shōgun (2024) - Rated 23 Aug 2025
"Production is good with enough surprises, but then descends into "Game of Thrones" trap of "you know the real problem with our bigger picture situation is you haven't been laid in a while". I love paled-skin, nude females as much as anyone, but this lazy writing has gotten old. Shōgun is also repetitive, the dialogue doesn't reveal much, it feels like the characters are just reading from a book, and many subplots are never explored. What else you got, Writers?"
Star Trek (2009) - Rated 03 Jul 2025
"They keep recycling the same old plots and subplots and dangers over and over again. Time travel, ejecting the warp core, etc etc. But now, hang on to your hats: the characters are showing us their youth and vitality by running around with their heads cut off, when someone coulda walked over to the other side and punched a button...so bizarre. Don't you just love the musical chairs of "who's the captain this minute?" Stop with the remakes, my childhood's soul can only take so much."
Ikiru (1952) - Rated 23 Aug 2025
"Made me yawn a lot. He mopes the whole time. Changing your life by going and doing things anyone and many do (gambling, clubs, drinks, dancing, voyeurism) is cheap storytelling, so nothing noteworthy here. Pacing is strange. Just when you think you'll see him change his life by helping the women: you don't, he's dead, the women wail, and the coworkers sit around and talk. Which means whatever arc for him is talked about in periphery."
Hellboy (2004) - Rated 23 Aug 2025
"He whines about girls/getting the girl. This is a superhero film?!"
Star Trek: Generations (1994) - Rated 03 Jul 2025
"Too much going on. The writers said it was Paramount's laundry list of had to haves: Klingons (again), Soren, the Nexus, Data's emotions, the ship explodes (again), Whoopi too (but not that kind!), etc etc. Instead of killing Kirk (on a "bridge"), the studio should be artists by disappearing him, to say that Kirk isn't really dead and therefore Star Trek isn't either because "the adventure continues". Come to think of it, who cares that they should included TOS - what, 6 films not enough?"
The Great Gatsby (1974) - Rated 27 Aug 2025
"Rich girls don't marry poor boys."
Harper (1966) - Rated 27 Aug 2025
"I knew right away I wouldn't like this film when Newman recycles a coffee filter - wtf is that?! Performance art?"
The Last of Sheila (1973) - Rated 10 Aug 2025
"Richies on a boat. It's annoying, full of itself, and I don't care."