CODA

My oldest son is hearing impaired. For those who don't have anyone with hearing impaired folks in their lives, deafness is graded on a six point scale. Your standard person with full hearing is a 1. A fully deaf person is a 6. My son is a 4 on both sides, albeit for two different reasons. This is, obviously, the obverse of the situation in CODA (which stands for Child of Deaf Adults), but there is a similar aspect in that there is a gulf between those with hearing and those without, and it's not about communication. It's about understanding and perception. Many with hearing automatically assume someone with hearing impairment or total hearing loss must also have neurological deficiencies or learning disabilities. Some (not all) deaf people prefer to associate with only deaf people. Being the one member of a family whose hearing status is different from the rest is a challenge for everyone. So I came into CODA curious at how honestly they would handle this. Would every deaf person (and the three deaf characters are played by deaf actors) be treated as saintly or magical? Would Ruby, the titular CODA, be rebellious and obnoxious and have to learn the error of her ways from her wise, deaf parents? Would this just be a standard coming of age story with deaf parents? I'm happy to say that the answers to those questions are all no. CODA is a coming of age story, yes. She does start to show some rebellion, but there's a good reason. And her family aren't saints. These are genuine people who share blood and proximity, but there are aspects of their worlds that cannot have overlap. I was genuinely surprised by how well this movie handles its story. I've seen some criticism that it's formulaic. There's nothing wrong with a formulaic movie if the formula is done expertly, and damned if CODA doesn't do just that. CODA is a coming of age story about Ruby, who is the family interpreter to the hearing world where her father and brother operate a fishing boat. Through signing up for choir because her crush is going into it, she discovers a sense of herself outside of that role through singing, which puts her dreams at odds with her parents treating her as a resource more than a member of the family. Her loyalty to her family is tested by this newfound discovery. She wants something that will not only take her away from them (she has a chance at a scholarship to a music school), it's also pursuing something that they literally don't have a frame of reference for. Family is very important in CODA, so it's refreshing and wonderful that all three of Ruby's family members has different personalities and points of view. Jackie, her mother, has an antagonistic bias against people who can hear; she assumes they won't try to communicate with her, so she needn't bother to make the first move. And because she can't hear Ruby sing, she can't comprehend of the possibility that she might be good, that other people might think she's good, and that Ruby might enjoy it. Her father, Frank, wants to communicate with the hearing community, he knows it's vital, but he doesn't know how to bridge the gap. He doesn't feel like the family has a choice but to keep Ruby around as their interpreter. And her brother, Leo, is angry that the family depends on Ruby. He doesn't want to be dependent on anyone, because it hurts his pride. They are all well-rounded characters with their own motivations and feelings, which gives CODA something a lot of coming of age stories lack -- a larger sense of the world around the young person at the center of the story. It helps make Ruby's torn loyalties make more sense; she doesn't want her family to lose their business, but she feels stifled being their doorway to the hearing world, and she wants to pursue something that she can't really share with them (yes, I know they can feel bass and vibrations, and there's a lovely scene towards the end where Frank puts his hands on Ruby's neck to feel her singing, but that's not the same as hearing it). When the family is faced with the possibility of losing their boat due to Coast Guard regulations, she volunteers to give up her dream and tells her parents she's excited, but she tells her music teacher that they wouldn't let her pursue it. She is conflicted, and their inability to hear and the consequences of it on their lives puts up a wall between them that she doesn't know how to breach. CODA, also and mercifully, doesn't fall into many coming of age cliches, or doesn't use them in the way you might expect. Yes, there are bullies here, a group of mean girls who torment Ruby about smelling like fish or having deaf parents. They don't get poetic comeuppance. In fact, they disappear about halfway through the movie. They're in the movie to show how she feels isolated everywhere she goes; at home, she's the only one who hears, and at school, she's the kid of deaf people who talk with their hands and smell like a fish market. She has no safe space in her life. Her and the guy she's crushing on have an argument, but it's not even at the halfway point, and it's resolved fairly shortly. By and large, though, he's not much of a factor in the movie. This is her journey about defining herself BY herself, not in contrast to or in conjunction with someone else. It isn't all melodrama and angst, though. There is plenty of humor to keep the movie light and enjoyable, especially jokes about the language barrier between ASL and the speaking world. And there's plenty of moments that will pull at your heartstrings, in genuine ways that don't feel manipulative at all. At the center of this all is Emilia Jones, who plays Ruby. She is the core of this movie. It's not her first movie, but from what I can tell, it's her first lead, and she handles it like she was born for it. Ruby feels real because of her acting. Everybody else deserves recognition too, for sure, but Emilia Jones has got legit chops way beyond her years. This was a coming out party for her. CODA is a sneaky movie. It tackles themes of loyalty and self-identity and isolation in a subtle way, through a lens most people wouldn't consider. I never once felt that it got sappy, corny, or cheap. I got angry at Jackie for being so clueless and stubborn and biased against people with hearing. I understood how her brother was both angry at their parents for depending on Ruby, and was also a little bit resentful at Ruby for enabling them to be dependent, because it made him feel useless. Is CODA formulaic? Yes, it is, but it knows how to use and skirt the formula in just the right ways, and won my heart doing so. I know I'm a sucker for this genre, so maybe I'm more lenient where others wouldn't be, but damned if this didn't outshine every expectation I had for it and then some.