Evil Dead Rise

I’ll give it this. It isn’t as terrible as the fourth one. But it also is entirely inconsequential, miserable, requires everyone be an idiot for the plot to work, disgusting more than frightening, warps the rules of the ED series, and it could be a generic possession movie if you took off the name. I’m impressed it had the balls to do some of the things it did (no spoilers), and I’m not talking about gore like the cheese grater scene. You think certain characters are off limits because of the movie’s structure, and you’ll be surprised, that’s all I’ll say. The new setting of an apartment complex is a refreshing change of pace from three movies in a forest and one in a castle in the forest. The effects are done well, even when they’re CGI, and there’s a ton of them, so gore-hounds will be in heaven here, especially the last 10-15 minutes. And the actress who plays the mom who becomes a Deadite … holy hell, does she make it work. If all you want is a white-knuckle, super-bloody thrill ride, you’re gonna get it, and you’ll leave happy. But for me, this was frustrating. Characters had to ignore the biggest red flags waving in their faces for the plot to happen. I know horror movies are usually where smart characters go to die, but this movie is a whole new level of it, and it gets tiring very quickly. I mean, the book is bound in flesh and is locked with FANGS, and it unlocks when it soaks up blood. Why would anybody continue to explore its contents? Never mind that someone made recordings of reading the book and pressed them into vinyl. That is moronic and unbelievable on so many levels, and it’s a trend in the movie; there are just so many moments where the stupidity is so profound, it breaks immersion. The rules from previous Evil Dead movies seem to be thrown out the window here, as being a Deadite seems to pass like a zombie curse if a Deadite does so much as scratch a person. And what is the point of the pre-credits sequence? It adds nothing whatsoever. Like I said, this is definitely a step up from the terrible, oppressively dour fourth ED movie. That mistook relentless hopelessness for horror and relied on excessive geysers of blood to shock instead of scare. This at least is watchable, has some inventive sequences and some bold plot choices, and a memorable final sequence (even if the wife and I laughingly compared it to the Multi-Bear from Gravity Falls). But when everybody in the movie needs to be a slack-jawed idiot for bad things to happen, and the movie starts inventing new rules or disposing of old ones, it actively damages whatever goodwill the good points of the movie earns. At this point, I’ve seen all I need to see from this franchise. It’s lost its way, and I don’t care if it comes back.