Jurassic World: Dominion

I was able to miss a half an hour in the middle of this and know exactly what was going on. That’s how little this movie has on the shelf. It offers nothing that other mediocre Jurassic sequels offer, and is bogged down by way too much plot, and yet is devoid of a good story. Worst of all, this movie, like Star Wars Episode 9 and Halloween Ends, continues the modern trend of giving fans the opposite of what they want in the closing chapter of a trilogy. This trilogy was building towards one story: all out war between humans and dinosaurs. A global conflict for survival. What do we get? A STORY ABOUT LOCUSTS AND GMO’S. I couldn’t give a damn about corporate politics over genetically engineered crops and industrial sabotage. I couldn’t give a damn if you gave me three. I don’t care about a snotty clone kid. I don’t care about a Tim Cook lookalike acting like every generic evil corporate cliche, waging war on independent farmers with super-crickets. I want one thing from a Jurassic Park movie: BIG LIZARDS WRECKING STUFF AND EATING PEOPLE. There were some okay action moments, and it’s fun to see the old cast, but the movie around it isn’t worth it. Not even as mindless popcorn fluff.