The Deep House

The internet has given the world so many useful tools. Access to communities of people with obscure hobbies or interests. Archives of forgotten movies, shows, and texts. Platforms for the average person to express their artistic creativity. Virtual tours of homes so one doesn’t have to physically be there to see the layout. That’s The Deep House. 85% of this average haunted house potboiler is a virtual tour of a submerged house. There’s some spookums and jump scares and all the haunted house tropes. The underwater aspect is a different touch and adds a new level of claustrophobia and a ticking clock aspect with available oxygen for the two divers, but it also means movement is restricted, and in a way, so is the movie. It never builds up a head of steam, floating along like its main characters do. All the fear and tension has to be conveyed by frenetic camera work or voice, because you can’t see the facial expressions of the protags. It doesn’t aim to be more than it is, and it does what it does well, but that’s literally all this does. There are no surprises in the script whatsoever. It is what it is and that’s all that it is. There’s something to be said for the movie knowing its lane and staying in it, but there’s also something to be said for being so rigid to the formula that it feels like the movie is on rails. This movie answers the question asked in 10 Things I Hate About You: “I know you can be overwhelmed, and you can be underwhelmed; but can you just be whelmed?” Yes, and this movie is proof.