Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

[cagedwisdom]

Michael Bay is on a mission. A mission to destroy all faith any proper movie lover might have had in Hollywood. A mission to cater to people who demand nothing more than shiny metal, clanky metal noises, dark booming voices and explosions for their buck. For this film is something truly dumb; like a pretty woman singing an average song very poorly and garnering applause for it, it manages to trick its audience into thinking it's worth the admission money, not to mention its $200 million budget.

It's hard to know exactly where to begin. The plot, even more nonsensical than the first, introducing new characters, locations, plot devices, without bothering to introduce them? The new transformers introduced, somehow managing to be even less interesting characters than the ones in the first film? In response to his critics Michael Bay has said "I make movies for teenage boys. Oh, dear, what a crime." No, Michael, it's not a crime to make movies for teenage boys. It is a crime to make movies that make teenage boys even dumber than they already are. It's also quite a feat.

There's not much more to say about it. When a film fails on such a fundamental level as this does it's not even worth the trouble to address all the issues. I don't really want to remember all the issues for long enough to write them down. It's a more watchable film than the first one surely - surprisingly the film has pacing that makes it possible at least to try to care what's going on (although towards the end the caring will dwindle away at a rapid pace until you're left with nothing but revolt at the idiotic piece of entertainment you're witnessing) and the human characters and interactions are, in a few scenes, mildly interesting. The dumbest film of the year, perhaps even the decade. If you're older than 16 years old and thought this was a good film: you are stupid. People want different things in a film, sure. But that said, if you are older than 16 and this is what you want in a film, you are stupid. And that's that.

24/100

(Review also available at my blog)

[Grit]

Transformers might be awful, but it's strange how you seem to be drawn towards it even though you know all too well what it's going to be like. It's almost like watching a car crash, horrific yet guitily entertaining.

[brandt64]

Wow, that was the most condescending review of a movie I've ever read.

[Zozan]

If you're older than 16 years old and thought this was a good film: you are stupid. People want different things in a film, sure. But that said, if you are older than 16 and this is what you want in a film, you are stupid. And that's that.

You don't sound like too mature yourself. Learn to respect the differences between preferences. Say whatever you gotta say about the movie. Don't insult other people.

[Pickpocket]

If you're older than 16 years old and thought this was a good film: you are stupid. People want different things in a film, sure. But that said, if you are older than 16 and this is what you want in a film, you are stupid. And that's that.

You don't sound like too mature yourself. Learn to respect the differences between preferences. Say whatever you gotta say about the movie. Don't insult other people.

aka I'm older than 16 and liked Transformers.

[Zozan]

aka I'm older than 16 and liked Transformers.

Yea I am older then 16. But I didn't see the movie.

[cagedwisdom]

Oh, I didn't know it was political correctness hour.

Think of it like this:

There's a plate of food. Pretty decent food. Then there's a plate of shit. Am I not at liberty to call people who prefer to eat the shit over the food idiots? Of course they are idiots. There is personal preference, of course. But once you prefer something that is blatantly idiotic that makes you blatantly idiotic in turn.

If anyone's offended by the notion I strongly suggest they reevaluate themselves before calling me out on it. As far as I can see there's no excuse for liking this film other than age/maturity/just plain dumb.

[paulofilmo]

So... you didn't eat shit by going to watch the movie?

Or did they just force it into your mouth as you handed them the money?

Maybe if more people refused to watch it, it wouldn't even be in the FUCKING CAFETERIA.

And this is some expensive shit.

[cagedwisdom]

Well, going to the movies is kinda like going to a restaurant without knowing what you're going to be served. It might be shit, it might be a glorious meal, the distinction is whether or not you eat the shit and be perfectly satisfied with it. That's when I object.

[Pickpocket]

As far as I can see there's no excuse for liking this film other than age/maturity/just plain dumb.

You are 100% right. The movie was made for dumbass 14 year olds.